These Scars Remind Me The Past Is Real
by Saiko Chi
Summary: L was bullied when he was a child and started to gain self loathing feelings. This caused him to start cutting his arms and thighs. He thought he would never be loved by anyone because he was ugly and worthless but little did he know there was someone out in the world waiting to love and care for L with all their soul. *AU, Light becomes a Wammy.*
1. Let The Blood Drip

**Heeeello guys. This story is gonna be sad and deep and whatever you call it, but it will get more romantic as it goes on so enjoy c;**

**Disclaimer: Nah, I don't own Death Note. But I would love to own Light if you know what I... I'll just stop now XD**

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L Lawliet was quite a happy person when he was a child, but he never had any friends, and he usually gotten bullied. He had a strong personality and tried to ignore the hurtful things the other children living at the Orphanage said. The children called him things like 'socially retarded, a freak, a disgrace of a human being, a disgusting bookworm with no friends,' and much more things about him, which made his self esteem decrease little by little, but he still tried his best to be happy. The rants became worse when the children became older, and he became the lowest of the low. If you were angry, he was the one you would yell at, or if you and your friends want to bug someone for shits and giggles, you would go to him.

"Go kill yourself, you lonely faggot." "You will never be loved by anyone." "You'll die a perverted virgin."

He was definitely not happy anymore; he actually showed no emotion whatsoever because he had no more tears to cry with, and no ego to rely on. L spent many sleepless nights because his mind forced him to revisit the hateful comments said towards him that day, and with every comment said, it roughly pierced into his soul; making it writhe. When his soul was finally dried out, it refilled itself with not happy emotions, but self loathing ones and with every new hurtful word said to him, it seeped into his soul, increasing his self loathing feeling.

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L locked his bathroom door while looking at the small metal blade he was holding in his hand. _'Go cut yourself, you worthless piece of shit.' _

L slightly cringed at the thought of the hurtful comment he heard a couple hours ago, and thought that he will take that advice. Who would care anyway?

L sat down on the closed toilet seat and nervously sighed. The words '_Go cut yourself' _kept replaying in his head, like it was taunting him.

"I am disgusting, so who would care? No one would ever want to see my body anyway." L mumbled to himself while rolling up his sleeve, which revealed his pale, forearm. L grabbed the blade off his sink counter and placed the blade end vertically onto his arm.

"Cunt."

**Slash.**

"Nobody."

**Slash.**

"Faggot."

**Slash.**

L kept cutting his forearm and spewing out terrible things about himself. His tears felt like they were burning his skin and the feeling increased more with every new cut he made. L started to enjoy the self pain he was causing himself, and he wanted more. He wanted to feel his skin sting and the blood leek all over his arm. He wanted to cut himself all over his body, and feel the burning sensation of his tears while they ran down his cheeks.

He cut deeper; making more blood seep out, more tears fall and more feeling of the pleasurable sting he was causing himself. He kept cutting like if it were an addiction that he could never get enough of. L wanted to stop because he KNEW that this was terrible and dangerous but he couldn't; it was his drug. He wanted to scar himself to remind that the past is REAL, and you could never run away from it.

When he was done scarring his arm, he placed the bloody blade back onto the sink counter and got a towel. L placed the towel onto his scarred arm and watched the blood stain through its white fabric.

'_Cut your wrists and slash your thighs. Show no emotion because everything's a lie. Loathe yourself and pray that you'll die. Watch your blood seep and your family cry.'_

L took the blade and washed its blood off with warm water. He'll save his thighs to cut another time. He might even cut the quote he made along his leg to remind himself that he is disgusting.

L has been cutting constantly, and it's the only thing that he enjoyed, L enjoyed it more than reading a good book. With every new comment said faced to him, he creates a new cut and with every cut, he looks along his leg to see his quote.

'_Cut your wrists and slash your thighs. Show no emotion because everything's a lie. Loathe yourself and pray that you'll die. Watch your blood seep and your family cry.'_

No one will love him, and no one would care if he faded off of this world. Everyone thought that he was a worthless piece of shit that was just a burden. L thought the same way about himself but deep down, there was still a tiny glimpse of happiness in his withered soul and it screamed that it needed love and compaction. The tiny feeling would grow and overcome all the loathe feelings and fill his soul with happiness if only he could be loved and cared by someone. The only person that kept him alive was Watari. Watari was like his father and he did care for him, but it wasn't enough. L wanted someone to fall in love with him and kill themselves to save L. He wanted someone that would have feelings for him that they couldn't even explain because their love is too strong. He wanted them to quiver in pleasure when they touched and kissed. But L kept telling himself that it would never happen because he is ugly and worthless but the thing that L didn't know is that there was someone waiting for him that would love him to pieces. They would kill themselves for L and do whatever he desires. L was clueless about this fact and when they meet, the tiny glimpse of happiness in his soul will disintegrate his self loathing feelings and pump his soul back with love and happiness. His scars will fade away, and his past will never be on his mind ever again.

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**I tried my best to be descriptive on the first chapter c; OH and btw if you are wondering; I don't cut XD I just learned some facts about it online and shlit like that, lol...**


	2. Raito Yagami

**Thanks High on the Rainbow. I wasn't really gonna try to make a long story because I'm not that good with making a thoughtful plot with like 35 chapters... Idk, I was thinking of like changing the scene to when it was in the future with Kira and all that shlit but it would be better if Light becomes a Whammy and Light becomes L's friend and stands up for him blah blah XD Anyway, I'll take this as a challenge and try my best to create a well thought out story c: **

**Also thank you Upper Tyes for the amazing complement :D I never knew that my writing was that descriptive lol XD**

**I am very happy that she survived, Deidara4ever ****J**

**Disclaimer: Nooo, sadly I do not own Death Note. Sadly...sadly...*cries***

L was sitting in his usual crouched position in the corner of the library while reading a new book that had gotten placed in the library. It was quite an enjoyable book with a great plot and a well thought through story. The pace of the story was not going to fast nor to slow so it was making the right atmosphere. The story was about the greatest detective of the world fighting against the greatest villain. The villain, named 'Kira' had the power of a Death Note and could kill anyone by just writing someone's name in the notebook with the persons face on their mind. To sum it up, the detective wanted to kill Kira and Kira wanted to kill him. It was indeed a great psychological book. When L was done reading his chapter, he decided to close his book and read some more later on. L sighed and stood up while lazily walking towards the library window to only see the bright blue sky and teenagers talking and laughing together. L cringed at how people can be friends with such evil individuals. People back stab and gossip behind your back. It was terrible but L found it amusing to observe from afar. Teenage girls usually brag about having the 'best' boyfriend that loves her the most but then a day later they complain because they ignore her feelings and only want her for sex. That is not love. You cannot describe love when you fall into it; your heart stops when your lover smiles and laughs. Then again, L couldn't judge love because he had never fallen into it, and he never really wanted to. He called himself asexual because he never found any gender attractive, and he was grateful. L didn't want to fall into that mushy love bullshit, or that's what his loathing emotion kept telling him.

"Stop staring at the boys outside you closeted pervert. One of the girls teased behind him while her friends' evil giggles joined in. L did not respond, nor did he move. He just kept gazing blankly at the willow tree dancing in the sudden gust of wind. Many people would have found it calming and relaxing, but for him it felt empty, just like if it were not there in the first place.

'_That adds up to eleven rude comments today, so eleven new cuts to engrave into my skin.' _L mentally sighed, and brushed past the girls to start walking towards the library door and heard one of the girls shrieked out to him, "YA' CAN'T DENY IT!" They girls started to chuckle loudly, making L roll his eyes at how idiotic they were.

L walked out of the library with his usual slightly hunched posture and his hands in his baggy jean pockets. He roamed around the halls while ease dropping on some of the conversations the other children were having.

"I'm not sure! Maybe she didn't do it. But she probably did because she's a total whore."

"Nooo, I have homework so we can't hang out. Sorryyy."

L was not surprised that they were talking behind another persons back and clearly lying about having homework. Everyone here is conniving, backstabbing assholes and that was a genuine fact. It will never change. L decided to stop ease dropping and go to his next class when he heard the bell ring until a conversation stopped him in his tracks.

"Oh my god, you will not believe it."

"Hmm? What is it?"

"A new Wammy is joining the orphanage and he is GORGEOUS. I have never seen someone that hot before!"

"Really? What's his name?"

"Hm, I'm not sure but he is stunning."

_'Hm, a new Wammy... _' L thought while he started to walk again. He didn't put much thought into it because he didn't care about a new dickhead joining this orphanage. It's just another brick on his loath filled soul and an extra cut on his body.

L walked into the door of his class and looked around just to see stares shoot back at him. He heard unwelcoming whispers followed by disgusting chuckles, but what's the surprise? L sat down at his usual desk that had hurtful and harsh words printed with sharpie all over it. L never had to worry about another person sitting in his desk because of that reason. The teacher walked in and the talking died down as the rest of the children sat back into their seats. Before the teacher started class, she planted a big grin and announced, "Hello Students! Before I start today's class, I would like to introduce to you all a new student that is joining us." As she finished speaking, she turned her head towards the door and immediately a young, beautiful man walked into class. His gorgeous shaded brown hair was perfectly styled with no hair frizzing. The Wammys House did not have uniforms so he ended up wearing a dark, navy blue v-neck sweater with nice fitting khaki pants. Most of the girls gaped and stared in awe at the stunning man while he men had jealousy written all over their faces.

_'Such stupid people.'_ L slightly chuckled at how idiotic the girls were for instantly 'falling in love' with someone just by looking at them, and how idiotic the boys were for becoming jealous over one male_. 'Yes, it is normal to blush and squeal when you see an attractive individual, but it's written all over their faces that they would 'love him with all your heart_.'_ You cannot possibly fall in love with someone by just gazing at them. If you love someone with all your soul, you will not care for their looks but only their heart and inner beauty.' _L finished internally rambling on about how females should not fall for the love of first sight bullshit, but he did not rant about men being jealous of another man's looks because he never experienced the emotion of jealousy.

"My name is Raito Yagami."

**Weeell, I hoped you like it so far! And if you could recommend what age L and Light should be, that would be fantastic Cx Not too young and under 18. Thanks! :D**


	3. Somone To Sit By

'_Hmm? So his name is Raito Yagami? He does look Japanese, so Raito means Light? Quite an odd name I must say.'_ One of L's inner thoughts kept trying to tell him that the name Light does suit him because he is burning hot and beautiful at the same time like a bright star in the cold, night sky, but L repressed that thought deep into his brain. '

"I am a sixteen year old Japanese boy with the IQ of 221, and I must not say the reason why I became a Wammy." This sentence shocked some people in the classroom from hearing that he had such a superior IQ. Yes, _Wammys House _is filled with very intelligent children, but this boys IQ is insane that it even slightly shocked L. L has not been shocked since he had gotten bullied for the first time which was; say 9 years ago?

'He has an_ IQ of 221? That is pretty close to mine. And apparently I am one year older than Light." _L thought to himself, like he usually did because he didn't use his emotionless voice often. Somehow his internal thoughts started to talk with his normal thoughts, as they screamed out, '_Oi! Oi L! He is pretty much the same age as you, and he is fucking HOT, so maybe you and Light can somehow hook up and you know, have some fun together? It won't be incest.' _L was disgusted of what his inner mind was telling him. How can he even think about having sexual intercourse with someone, let alone a pretty boy like him!? Never! And how would he "hook up" with someone who will obviously become popular with the girls? L is considered disgusting and a nobody so even if Light did become gay; L would be the last person he would choose to be with...People shriek if they touch the "non bathing vampire," so the new Wammy would probably also. L shuddered while cringing which resulted with him doing an odd seizure shiver so it looked like he jizzed in his pants. When L opened eyes that he didn't know were closed, he slightly jumped of the sight of the new student smiling at him a couple of feet from L.

"Can I sit here?" The new Wammy muttered with a slight chuckle which made L utterly shocked, even though his expression was the same. Light flipped his auburn hair so that he can see better with his gorgeous sepia eyes. They were the opposite of Ls sorry excuse for eyes because they were filled with emotions of love, caring and kindness; they could put a screaming baby at ease. Lights skin was for more tanned then Ls pale, milky skin, and the color made his whole body even more beautiful. His lips are a cute, natural color of light pink. They were slightly puckered, and L assumed that it was natural, and kind of attractive.

'_No, not attractive, just natural.' _L quickly fixed his thought.

L lowered his gaze to the boys tight, v-neck sweater. The way the sweater clung onto him showed off his muscled abdomen pretty well, and would probably make most people have the urge to see the real thing. L trickled his blank stare down Lights clothed ***God damnit.*** body until it stopped at his groin. His khaki pants were not like Ls baggy jean ones, they were tighter, but not too tight to fully show off his budge.

L was still speechless; not sure what to say to the student that obviously didn't know that L was the kid children would normally pick on. Everyone was shocked that the new kid wanted to sit by the "most palest; creepiest; emotionless monster" and not sit by _THEM._ They needed to tell the new kid that L is not someone you would sit by, and instead sit as far as you can from him. The children were about to shriek and yell at Light to not sit beside a demon that might suck his soul up until they chocked on their spit with what L responded with.

"S-sure, I don't mind."

The kids were mad and especially the girls because they didn't get a hottie to sit next to them. L was too busy to roll his eyes at the stupid expressions because this is the first time someone sat next to him in quite a while. Yes, Light Yagami is a new Wammy and does not know anything about L's reputation, but it still slightly made L's stomach stir with excitement and hope. Hope for what you may ask? Well, hope for Light not being scared of L's appearance, for Light to stand up for him and maybe even become his friend. Yes, he had this feeling but it was deep down in his gut, and his loathe feelings kept trying to cover it from seeing the 'Light.'***Worst fucking pun I have ever made XD* **But this feeling will grow only is Light would stand up for L and become his friend. L would start to show more emotions and become a little happier than before.

**I am a lazy little fucker. I wanted to make a 5K word chapter but NOPE. only 1K XD Sorry, I suddenly lost my spirit to write today. You need spirit if you want to make good work, so that is my excuse. **


	4. Mentaly Scarred

**Heh, sorry not updating in like, forever. I don't have any excuses; just pure laziness XD**

**Disclaimer: Nah, I don't own Death note. But if I did, instead of people saying Oh my god, it would be Oh my Kira XD Cuz... Kira is god...WOO WOO KIRA!**

It had been merely 10 minutes but it felt like hours for L. He kept glancing towards the new student; and once in a while, Light catches him. Light does not seem to be bothered, instead a smile perks on his pretty face as gazes back into Ls obsidian eyes. L would quickly turn away; somehow still keeping his emotionless expression, even though some one is being friendly towards him for the first time in...'Forever.'

_'I am aware that Yagami kun does not realize my reputation is terrible, but he still decides to sit beside me? A pale, emotionless, freak like me? I do not understand his reasoning.' _L kept trying to figure out why this happened, but came up with no answer; but that didn't stop him from stealing more glances at the boy. His perfect posture and the beautiful choice of clothing. His natural shade of pink on his lips that make you want to devour them. Everything about Lights psychical appearance is flawless, which results with every ones heart skipping a beat when they gaze in awe. Even L, but the stubborn boy kept trying to ignore the feeling. He...Just wanted to look at him, because he was kind to him. L wanted to know why he chose to sat down beside him. There was an odd aura on Light that made you want to talk to him, at least just once.

Light internally chuckled at L who kept trying to steal glances at Light. He didn't know why he sat beside this boy; so pale with a very odd sitting position. His bare feet were on the desk as his old, worn out shoes were left alone on the ground beside him. His knees rested on his shoulders as some of his ruffled hair laid upon on them. Dark bags stood out on his pale, milky skin underneath his emotionless eyes. Everything about him screamed repeal, but all Light did was attract. Light just felt the urge to become acquaintances with this odd man, or he would say as "unique". So very unique; he stood out from all the other boring faces like a blood stain on a white sheet, but Light would prefer to think of him as a delicate Lily, standing straight up among the decaying and drooping Lily's. Light never thought this way about anyone before, and yes, he has met individuals that are attractive, but their lack of intelligence is far from Lights liking...But when Light gazes at the unique man; not knowing anything about him, he feels his stomach flutter. Light... is struck from love at first sight.

_NO! Raito, you will not have this kind of relationship with the same gender! It is wrong; even god forbids it! _

_Dad, I...I just wanted to try to have-_

_SHUT UP! YOU WILL __NOT __HAVE THAT DISGUSTING BEHAVIOR IN YOUR LIFE! YOU ARE WORTHLESS; HOW CAN I EVEN CALL YOU MY SON?! _

_Dad... plea-_

_YOU ARE A SINNER! YOU SHALL BE PUNISHED FOR BETRAYING GOD!_

Yes, Light was struck by love at first sight, but he was mentally and psychically scarred. The hurtful and homophobic words his father spat at him sunk through his skull and into his mind. The words he heard can never be unheard. They stay in his mind, and remind him that he shall not betray the rules of god, or he will be punished. Tears and blood had fallen that day, along with an 11cm cut on his back. His mother and sister stood and watched as Light was abused. They did nothing; they felt no sympathy for him. Light could feel their stares cut into him; gazing and judging. He could feel all the hatred in that room, and it was horrible. Everything was utterly horrible. He was not loved by who he wanted to truly love; his family. They treated him like a pebble you would kick when walking down the sidewalk, but they would kick the pebble hard. His family would use any excuse to punish Light, and the punishment would always go too far. Yelling and beating, as Light laid on the ground; writhing. He was aware that he can call the police, but he was so mentally scarred that he was afraid his family would find him, and abuse him much worse. Light could not do anything without his family punishing him. All his anger was pent up in his body for far too long, until he broke. His mental state shattered as is mind filled up with psychotic thoughts. He wanted to them to scream for help and their tears ran down their face; mixing with the pool of blood around them. He was craving to see their blood gush out of them; splattering on his face. He desired to kill them; and he did as he wished. Light couldn't stop laughing when he saw his mother and sisters terrified expressions, as he played around with his father's blood. His blood was splattered along Lights body, like he desired. Everyone was crying, and yelling, like he wished. Light was filled with joy as he gazed among three dead bodies that had their stomachs cut open and their detached limbs scattered around them. His psychotic high died down, as he started to realize what he has done. Light...Murdered his family, in such a horrible way. What kind of demon dwelled inside of him that made Light do such a sinful act? Was it a blood craving demon? Or was it Lights... True self? Light dropped to his knees with his bloody palms pushing into his eyes. He wanted this to be a nightmare; he wanted to love his family, not kill them, but Light knew that this was reality. The cruel, reality that he had caused for himself. Light could not remember much after that scenario, but it ended up with him sitting in an alleyway; terrified by everything he had done, and Watari finding him. Light became an orphan that day, and only he knows the reason why.

**Lol, I promise the next chapter will at least be over 3k XD**


	5. These New Feelings Torture Me

** My reasoning of Lights sexuality:**

**His hair has no grease and no tangle, that means he uses girly conditioner and shampoo for his hair to be so flawless. It is probably really soft too.**

** He has no acne, so he either cleans it really well and uses product or wears makeup to hide him from breaking out, or all of that. Like come on, a boy his age is going through puberty so he has to have acne and pimples, but nope. He has to be gay to do such things for his skin.**

**He despises woman; not interested with dating any of them. He hasn't fucked Misa either. If a different male was dating Misa, their nautral instinct would be to reproduce, due to the chemistry and hormones floating around in their body. Even if they loathed her personality, they wouldn't give up the chance to have happy fun time with her because she is also super model, and it would be totally good for the mans reputation. Yet again, Light seems to keep his flaming hormones from Misa, even though she wants to ride his dick.**

** Light also wasn't that taken back with having to be handcuffed to Lawliet. They had to change, sleep and shower together. Also Lawliet accused Light of being Kira, so he will be watching him 24/7. While he sleeps, Lawliet would be glaring dagers into Lights body; making sure to identify any movement; so with showering. Light would have to feel Lawliets virgin eyes burn into him; taking in and absorbing the view of Lights magnificent body. He would have to feel Lawliets eyes as they flamed with hormones, but Light is a super genius, so he wasn't oblivious about this fact from the start. **

**L is also a social reject; not 'hooking up' with anyone, or if he had tried, they would call him a freak because of his albino colored skin, even though he was from England. The black bags under his eyes stood out on his skin. Worn out shoes; ruffled rat nest hair and the same over sized clothing he wears everyday. It would scare many people... So he is a virgin. A virgin with bottled up hormones and flamed so high it would eventually burn through him. Burn through him until it took over his entire being...Urging to be released... Oh my, what do we have here? A defenseless hotty sleeping beside me ever so peacefully that I could easily take advantage of... Hair so soft; I want to touch. Lips so delicate; I need to ravish. Body so flawless; I desire to pound. And their he goes; so hormone delusiond that he would rape Light. Oh but Light is okay with his because he is a obvious closeted homo.**

**Just saying XD**

**Disclaimer: Nope, I don't own Death Note. If I did, L and light would have hot, steamy incest smex that would make you tingle.**

After that very sinful act, Light realized how much of a tool he was. He could have stood up to his family ages ago, but instead he bottled his feelings inside; causing him to snap which resulted with Light killing his family. He didn't need to do what his family desired. Light was now free from them, but was still trapped inside a mental loop of his past. He did whatever his family desired; but now they were gone, Light was free. Light was free to but he didn't realize it. His mind kept replaying the abuse he went through; replaying the feelings on pain; feelings of hatred over whelming his body. Light couldn't recover his mental scars himself; he needed help by someone that would make Lights traumatic memories melt, so that he could be free again. Light needed someone that would never leave his side, and tell him that they love him. Light _needed _to know what the feeling of love felt like that he did not experience when he was a child. The love that would warm his heart; make his feel safe. And when he is loved; his scars will fade away, and his past will never be on his mind ever again...

Light gazed at L from the corner of his eye; observing every movement. Light gawked as if the boy was something fascinating that Light never seen before. Something that he never experienced...The new Wammy absorbed the sight of the unique boy. He has spiky; raven hair, but would probably was a disguise and it really felt soft and comforting. His skin was pale, almost symmetrical to a porcelain doll. His lips looked so soft... Like two little pillows lightly resting on top of each other...

Suddenly, a memory of his father yelling homophobic words flashed through his mind; almost like it were there; in front of his eyes. He saw the anger in his fathers expression; and it terrified Light. It made him feel even more trapped.

_ 'No, I shall not start to feel attracted to this boy. It is wrong and... And I... I... I will only become acquaintances with him. Nothing more...' _Lights scarred mind felt satisfied with this decision, but his soul desired more satisfaction than just simple 'acquaintances.' Something more like a best friend. Maybe even a lover that would make him feel warmth in his heart and pleasure in his body.

L could feel Lights gaze burn into him; reading and observing. Lights head was facing forward, but his eyes were shifted to his left, staring at L for a reason that was unknown to him. Ls fast thumping heart beat interrupted his hearing as the teachers' voice sounded mumbled as if he were a good distance away. L didn't know why he felt like this... this odd feeling that was entirely alien to him; so hard to identify and explain.

_'Why is Yagami staring at me so intensely? It's a stare that I cannot recognize; much different from the judgemental stares I get daily. It doesn't seem like a hurtful stare, it's instead filled with...Kindness...I am very confused.' _L hated to be unaware and clueless about anything, so he tried his best to recall what this scenario was, but came to no conclusion. Ls self loathing started to fire up inside him as he called himself idiotic and foolish for not knowing such a thing. He hated himself for this, because it was tearing his insides. Searching and savaging for the answers and it would only stop when the answers are found. Normal beings would seem thrilled that they found the answer they desired, but unfortunately not for L. His cluelessness had always left hatred in the pit of his stomach; seeping into his blood stream as it traveled throughout his body. Spreading like a virus that he could only have. L hated the feeling, but also couldn't get enough. The feeling of hating himself was his drug that he needed to keep injecting in himself or he might lose the little sanity he had left.

Throughout the whole class, L did not learn a single thing. But he knew all the details of what was being taught so it wasn't any trouble. To re word the sentence, it was more like that L did not listen to a single word that he teacher said. If he would of tried to take his mind off the new student, the words from the teacher would only pass through L; his brain not absorbing a single thing. It was the first time this had happened to L and it was odd, but also a little exciting.

Ls thoughts were interrupted by the obnoxious bell. Ug, how he hated that bell. It rang through his ears and stayed inside Ls skull for a few more moments. Ringing and clanging... Ls sudden reaction was to move his stare full on to the boy sitting beside him. Quite an odd reaction, but he was more interested on why Light suddenly looked so relieved when the bell rang. It was not the stereotypical relief of a high school student as he would finally be 'free' from class. It was more of a happy relief, a relief of something exciting that might happen soon... Emotions like these were hard for L to read because he never really got to see happy and cheerful expressions when he was around. Just judgemental and hateful.

Light met his bland gaze with a smile on his face. But his smile died down into a frown as he saw the writing on Ls desk. He never saw it until now, surprisingly, but he was mortified by it. '_Why would people write such things on an innocent boys desk? He doesn't seem harmful.' _

"What...Happened to your desk?" Light uttered while still gazing at the words that read out 'Faggot', 'Die', and much more harsh things.

"What do you think?" L answered; but finding that he sounded completely rude. He immediately regretted his choice of wording and tone in his voice when he saw the expression Light gave him. It looked hurt and shattered and... Concerned... L was so confused and dumbfounded why he would worry about how Light thought about him. He is like the rest; just hateful and ignorant...

"Why would people do this to you?" L was taken aback by the sudden response and realized that Light wasn't hurt by his rude comment; it was because Light felt sorry for L. Thoughts and feelings kept spinning around inside of him; confusing him to the bitter end_. 'Why would he feel sorry for me? Is it because Light is new and he is completely unaware of my brutal reputation? That has to be it...'_

L finally snapped back to reality, but before he could say anything, students started to swarm around Light.

"So you're new, ai? I hope you like it here!"

"Me and my friends could show you around if you like!"

"You can sit with me at lunch break."

Light didn't want to be rude, so he quickly answered everyone's statements. He wanted to talk to that boy. He just seemed so very interesting to Light, even though he knew nothing about him. The crowd of people died down and he was finally able to see the desk with nasty words written on it, but no student sitting at it. Light whipped his head around; trying to spot the boy and if he were in the class, but had no luck. L left without finishing his question... Light sighed and thought that L just wanted to be alone and that he would try to talk to him later. At this moment, Light was urging to get food in his stomach, so he went to have lunch with these people that asked him. Maybe he can make some new friends.

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**I know I promised to have this chapter over 3k, but I have lied once again. I am terrible XD  
**


	6. You Helped Me When No One Else Would

**Lol; sorry that the last chapters A/N was like half the story... Also, is it odd that when I give someone thumbs up, I rapidly thrust my thumb in the air so it looks like I'm shoving it up an invisible ass? People give me the odd glare when I do that, but you know how many fucks I give? None. ****ヽ****(**^ **´)****ノ**

**Disclaimer: Nopey dopey, I don't own Death Note. But I do own the new 'shove your thumb up my bum' thumbs up. Use it wisely. Rated E for everyone. **

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Light had met some people that looked interesting to talk to, but unfortunately they were boring. Yes, at Wammys Orphanage everyone here is beyond intelligent but these students lacked a sense of humor, or they just communicated about uninteresting and unreliable subjects. Light was eager to meet the interesting looking boy that he didn't even get a name from, but was stuck with clingy students. Light replied to their stupid questions; smiling a fake smile; laughing a fake laugh. He didn't want to be hated, but he didn't like these students. Light thought about the boy and how his skin was like fresh snow. His raven hair had a mind of its own; reaching out in all directions. Obsidian pools for eyes... They were emotionless, and Light wanted to know the reason why. He wanted to know why he looked sleep deprived and wanted to know why people bully him. Light wanted to help...

Lights train of thought was interrupted about what his 'friends' were talking about; finally something interesting...

"Light-kun? Do you know who you were sitting beside last class?" Mikami quietly said to Light, almost like he was telling a secret.

Light flinched by how Mikami addressed him. Mikami was definitely clingy; Light could even tell by it in his eyes and the way he acted. There would be a sparkle in his eyes when Light would talk to him. There would be a faint smile on his face that apparently only Light can see. When Light shook Mikami's hand when they greeted, he beamed like a beacon; almost if he were a fan girl reacting to yaoi. It were small things, but Light was pretty sure that he had a new stalker.

"No, I didn't get his name. I would like to though because he looks oddly unique and I might want to be friends with him." That was a lie; Light wanted to be much more than friends, but his mind kept telling him that it was wrong, even though it was perfectly normal.

Lights 'friends' gasped as Trinity- very attractive but often quite perverted- shouted out, "You want to be friends with L Lawliet!?" Some stares moved to them as the hallway gotten quieter. Light internally smiled for finally knowing the boys name, but was mad by what Trinity responded with.

_'Is it so bad to be friends with him? He looks harmless... These students are such bullies...'_

"What's so wrong about being friends with Lawliet? He seems nice." Light slightly growled as his eyes turned into slits.

"Lawliet is hated by everybody! He looks like a bum too. Disgusting rat nest hair; probably loaded with grease due to the lack of showering. He has the skin of an albino even though he is not one. His eyes seem to burn into anybody he looks at, and he is just plain awkward. He never speaks and he has the disgusting hunched back. He always wears the same over sized clothing but never wears shoes. He-"

"YOU ARE ALL SUCH BULLIES! HE NEVER SPEAKS BECAUSE HE HAS TO GO THROUGH ALL THE PAIN THAT EVERYONE HAS CAUSED HIM! He probably wants to feel loved and cared for, but his emotions are SHATTERED from all these critical words that plummet into his soul every day." Light was fed up with this. '_How can people be so mean to one being? Lawliet has feelings and emotions he wants to share, but he cannot because all these people that are corrupting him. These people don't know how much it hurts to be forgotten and unloved. They don't know how it feels to be beaten and abused by people you just want to love and laugh with.'_

Light felt anger dwell up inside of him, but decided he should to stop arguing or else his insanity might fire up again. Light turned around and walked down the hallway; trying to find L. He needs to find him and comfort him. Light wants to talk to L and make sure he is safe. After a couple of minutes of stomping down the hallway, the hallway was blocked by people surrounding something. The odd thing is that it was dead silent. Slightly curious, Light made his way through the crowd of people and was taken back of the sight of L of his knees with the most insane expression on his face. Light was overwhelmed by the thoughts that pounded in his head.

_'Is L okay? Should I help him? Why does he look insane? Wasn't he normally expressionless?'_

Light wanted to say something, but his words were stuck in his throat. He wanted to move his legs but his feet were stuck to the floor like dried glue on paper. All he could do was gaze at L who was intensely gazing back at him. The hallways silence was replaced with small choking laughter that dripped out of L's mouth...

**Around 10 minutes before**

L walked down the hall towards the library while lost in thought about the new Wammy. He was confused by all these feelings that were unknown to him that kept pulsing in his nervous system. Every time L heard name 'Light Yagami,' his stomach stirs and his nerves tingle. Every time he thought about the boy, his head pulsates.

'_Why am I suddenly feeling like this? Was it wrong of me to suddenly leave him; maybe he's wandering around, trying to find me.'_

_-_Pulsating sensation-

_'No! How could I even think like that? Probably by now he heard about how disgusting I am and is now hanging around the dicks that are supposedly his new 'friends'...'_

-Stomach stirs-

'_But why on Kiras name can't I stop thinking about him? Why did he sit beside someone with their bare, pale feet on their desk? With ruffled rat nest hair and sleep deprived bags underneath their emotionless eyes... Why did he sit beside me even though I look profoundly disgusting!?' _

Ls obliviousness continued savaging and tearing his insides for the answers, but none were found. The feeling left self loath in the pit of his stomach; seeping in his blood stream as it spread through his body. All these feelings clashed together; overwhelming the poor boy to the bitter end. His mind kept pulsating. Stomach stirring. Veins on the verge of combustion from the self hate that overwhelms inside of them. L could barely walk correctly as the nerves in his legs tingled for a reason that was alien to him. He stumbled down the hallway and had nearly fallen a few times, but of course, no one wanted to help him. They didn't care about what L was going through because he was considered something that they neglected and hated with a passion. They didn't want to deal or interact with L, so they left him to rot, but at the same time they hated his guts. Not going near him, but if they did they would only hurt him for the fun of it. Psychically and mentally.

L could feel his eyes bulging out of his skull as thoughts kept looping in his mind. All the pain of self loathing and pulsating and veins that were on the verge of exploding would surely make him insane if it went any longer. L hated this, and loved it at the same time. He hates how this is driving his mental state to the end of the cliff, but he loves it to. It's like he can't get enough of something that he knows is utterly terrible.

With every step he took with his wobbly legs, it would make them feel heavier. It would make him feel like he was stepping in the abyss because his legs were rapidly losing feeling. L was frightened about what was happening to him; all his thoughts and feelings clumping up inside of his body was just too much. L took a few more wobbly steps until he couldn't feel his body anymore; only his heart furiously beating out of his chest and is ragged breath. A light thud was caused by the impact of his knees falling on the hallway ground. Stares stared to move towards the sight of him; head drooped forward so that his eyes were hard to see. People would think that they were emotionless like usual, but in this rare case they were open widely to the maximum. His pupils were dilated as little red veins reached out from the sides of his eyeballs. The sides of L's mouth twitched slightly; slowly forming into a deranged smile. Now this was visible to most of the students and they started to become silent as they stared. No one has seen L like this, and most of them were curious and a little scared of what was causing L to break into such a creepy smile. Maybe his mental state shattered? But that couldn't happen because it was destroyed a while ago.

Uncomfortable thoughts and feelings kept swarming inside of him and his last brick that kept all his insanity trapped inside of him finally toppled over. When his insanity was free, it spread through L like wild fire that was merely impossible to put out. He loved the feeling, but his subconscious told him to deny it. To deny the insane, psychotic thoughts in his mind and come back to reality. All his new feelings and thoughts interfered with each other and it was just too much. The Pulsating in L's skull was going at a rapid speed; his nervous system was corrupting; legs had already lost all feeling and now his arms started to shut down as his feelings kept fighting with his insanity. He wanted to laugh and scream and cry all at the same time. Let his insanity drip out of his mouth... L fwong his head back up as his stare shot through every one. He enjoyed the terrified expressions the students were making, but he wanted it to stop. He wanted to make people fear him but he also wanted people to not. Everything was just too much; it was boiling up inside of him, wanting to be released. He found Lights eyes and gazed into them. They were filled with fear and they also looked... concerned... This triggered something in L as he started to laugh. Small, chockey chuckles slipped out of Ls mouth and into the student's ears. It became louder and louder until he was merely screaming. Laughing and screaming as tears ran down his face; burning his skin. His screaming laughter echoed through the whole hallway as more people started to gather around. L finally let his insanity free and it just felt so good. L's insanity kept leaking out of his mouth as his psychotic eyes were still locked on Lights. L kept thinking that Light was the one that made him snap. He kept thinking that he was the bastard that made him feel like this; feel new feelings that scared the living shit out of L until he was insane.

After his terrifying laughing fit, L started to feel dizzy as the world was a blur. He could see the outline of people but all the details were smudged out. L's thoughts jumbled all together; making it hard to concentrate. Blurriness increased as the hallway started to fill up with voices, but it was hard for L to hear. L's eyes fluttered shut as his limp body fell to the floor; and not gracefully if you may ask. It looked rather uncomfortable the way L fainted; limbs bent in an odd way.

Fainted.

L had fainted.

This registered in Light's mind as he finally got control of his body. He instantly ran to L and checked if he had hurt himself with falling. His head did knock into the ground rather roughly, but luckily no injures accorded. He checked L's pulse and found that it was beating normally. Light pulled up L's sleeve to check if he had bent it the wrong way, but was taken aback by the scars engraved on his forearm. There was too many to count… There was fresh ones that looked like was done only hours ago, and there was also healing ones. It broke Lights heart to see so many cuts made on his skin…

Light pulled down L's sleeve and picked up his limp body in bridals pose. L wasn't that heavy; actually, to his surprise L was quite light. Light strutted past the students that had their mouths open like a retarded fish.

'_Disgusting. They are the ones who did this to him.'_

Ignoring all the hurtful whispers and comments that the other children were saying, Light walked down the hallway to the nurses. Even the nurse was surprised that another student helped L. Light talked about what he had witnessed in the hallway as the nurse nodded and responded with, "Well, L is greatly hated by the other students in this school. He is lacking the kindness and love that he needs. This probably triggered him to have a mental break down. It would be normal for a teenager like him that is suffering great difficulty to be socially acceptable and hormones that overwhelm inside of him to break down. Thank you for telling me these facts… If you excuse me, I'm going to check if Lawliet has a concussion or any other injuries. When I come back, please go and sit beside Lawliet for when he awakes, he will feel safer. You are the only one who has ever helped him in a situation like this." The nurse sat up and walked to where L was laying and pulled the curtain so that they could not be seen. Light stayed seated and sighed; thinking about how cruel people can be to L. Was he the only one that had helped him when he was injured? It is absurd but it was the sad reality.

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**HOLY FLUCK I made it to 2.5k words on this chapter ;w; *cough* Sorry if there is any mistakes or parts that make no flucking sense... I was tired when I finished this chapter because I haven't slept for two days ._.** **I'm not planing to sleep this night either lol. Don't want to spent precious hours on sleep when I could be doing more productive things. Like watching anime while eating a bucket of ice cream and ravishing the dough off of pizza pockets. That's another weird thing I do... I bite the sides of the Pizza Pocket, I open it up, I eat the insides and I eat the dough off... Any ways, Happy Dollars Day! *cough* Durarara *cough*And If you are wondering who Trinity is, that is me XD I can toot my own horn once and a while, lol.  
**


	7. W-what!

**Is Light my favorite or L?: Well, I adore both. Reasoning time :D**

**I love Light because he is oh so sexy. Yes, he is probably a homosexual (lol was my earlier reasoning obvious enough? XD) but can't I still drool over him? He is very intelligent, but his pride swells a little too big. Well, without his pride he would be a totally different person XD. Well, in anime I look forward to insane people like Light. Not too much or too little. His psychotic laugh is wonderful; and he is just amazing. Yes I think it's a little stupid for people to hail Kira because all he does is kill criminals that are on death row, but I don't care. If I was in that anime I would still love Kira and probably become like Mikami and Misa combined. *shudders***

**And for L, I would say that he is oddly attractive. His pale skin isn't sickly pale, it's like an albinos and I think albinos are rather cute. His skin suits his messy, raven hair. I do wish that he shows more emotions though, but a smile perks on my face when he does because it's rare lol. He is also very intelligent, but I don't think that he would want to be my friend. I'm fucking stupid as hell XD. I laso totally envy his metabolism ;-; but I love how much he adores justice 3. Oh my Kira the Another Note LA BB cases was an amazing novel. Recommend it if you haven't read it XD.**

**Disclaimer****: No, I don't own anything from Death Note. If I did, it would be rated 18+ ;o Ho ho if you know what I mean. Kinky gay porn is what I mean XD**

* * *

When the nurse came back, Light immediately sat down in the cushioned chair beside where L was slumbering. He gazed at his sleeping face; looking so calm like he doesn't have a single care in the world, but his true reality is heart breaking. Light felt his soul shatter when he thought about what he had heard earlier. That L is the most hated student in the entire school; not one child here would even help him if he had gotten hurt. Light knew how L felt; how it felt like to be unwanted and abused. L just wants to be truly loved by someone even if he keeps telling himself he doesn't. Deep down inside of L, there is a tiny bit of happiness and joy that screams out 'love me!', but he is so mentally scarred that he doesn't realize it.

Light scanned the sleeping body in front of him, not understanding why people thought he was so unattractive. Ls skin is not sickly pale, but pale like a winter rabbits fur. He didn't appear creepy with the sleep deprived bags underneath his eyes; they made him seem like a cute panda. He doesn't seem unhygienic like what Light has heard so far, L actually looks like he cleans himself well. Yes, his hair has a mind of its own, but it's far from greasy. He doesn't have body odor, pimples, or thick, bushy eyebrows. He seems to take care of his self rather nicely. Maybe he does have to comb his hair, but Light finds it rather cute. It makes him seem innocent and vulnerable…

Light shook his head to try to clear his homosexual thoughts and instead replaced with homophobic ones.

_'I mustn't think like that towards someone the same gender as me that I have barely even met…We will only become friends…'_

Lights mind kept denying his homosexuality, but his subconscious was screaming the opposite. It was shrieking to Light that he could make his own decisions with himself because he is grown up, but Light kept stuffing those thoughts in the back of his skull.

After a while of Light sitting there either awing at L or denying his homosexuality, L began to stir awake. Light snapped back into reality and watched L's eyes flutter open. He yawned and rubbed the sleep out of his half lidded eyes while registering where he was. He recalled the earlier events and nearly shuddered. Why would L do something that would attract so much attention? He snapped and just started laughing insanely in the middle of the hallway while other students surrounded and watched him. L sighed and lazily glanced around; deducting that he was in the nurse's room. He was about to leave the bed until his eyes met with Lights. Fear nearly struck on Ls face as he quietly gasped. Questions about Lights presence invaded his mind, like that he was here to make fun of him, or do some sort of cruel prank.

An awkward atmosphere floated around them as the uncomfortable silence dragged on. They just stared at each other; making Light more nervous. Light wanted to break the silence, so he stuttered out, "A-Are you feeling alright?"

L completely ignored the question and sternly asked, "What are you doing here." It didn't sound like a question but it got the point across, and Light could definitely feel the point. It jabbed into his heart like a knife and shattered it to pieces.

_'Why doesn't he feel welcomed? Is he just suspicious...?"_

"Well, after you fainted, I took you to the nurse's office and I thought it would be kind to stay with you…I could leave if you like…" Light slightly drooped his head lower avoided eye contact with L.

L felt his stomach flutter again and his nerves tingle. His head pulsated as his heart pounded faster; veins full of self hate from his obliviousness…

A faint blush dusted on Ls pale cheeks and he uttered out, "You…You took me here when I was injured…?"

Light looked back up to connect his gaze with Ls. He felt happier that L wasn't angry.

"Of course I did, L. I couldn't leave you on the hallway ground. "

"How do you know my name?"

"I heard the other students talking bad about you…"

"And yet you still are here with me even though I frighten most students? Even though I am extremely socially awkward? That I never sleep and that I look like a disgusting pervert?" Light felt a tug of guilt inside of him as he continued to stare at L.

"I think they are incredibly terrible to bully someone like you. I know how it feels to be unloved and treated very unfairly, and I don't get why people do it. It made me feel like I had no place in this world…Like no one would truly love me and care for me. And besides, you are far from perverted and disgusting. I think you look kind. Those students are heartless, blind idiots for thinking such untrue nonsense about you." Light slightly chuckled and radiated a smile.

L mentally cursed that lovely smile. It made his stomach stir even more if possible and his heart skip a couple of beats. His lips looked so soft and tasty…

L mentally shook his head to try to get such thoughts out of his head. '_What is this boy doing to me?'_

"L, are you alright? It looks like you're about to vomit and your face is all flushed…" Light stood up and walked to L which made him panic even more. Ls hand cupped his own cheek and found that it was radiating an unnatural amount of heat. Light placed his soft palm of Ls forehead which resulted with L to blushing even more.

"You're heating up; I think you may have a fever. Do you feel unwell?"

"N-no! I don't have a fever… I feel fine."

Light pulled back his hand and sat back down, looking a little concerned.

"Why does Li-Yagami-san worry about me so much?" L asked, almost forgetting about honorifics and how polite Japan is.

"Well, I consider you as my friend so of course I worry about you. And you can just call me by my first name. I don't mind if you use an honorific or not."

Ls heart felt like it jumped out of his chest and his eyes widened as he gazed at his new and first friend. Why was he feeling like his? He always told himself that friends are just a nuisance, even though he never had one.

"You consider me as your friend?"

Light chuckled. "Of course I do! All the other students don't arouse my interests as much as you do. They are either extremely rude or just plain boring. I know we just met, but you have a unique aura that made me want to know more about you."

L was completely dumbfounded by this situation. Another student actually wanted to be his friend? Did Light sit beside L because he supposedly had a unique aura? Light wanted to be his friend; he called L kind looking; unique from the rest and he carried L to the nurses when in need. L thought about this and deducted that Light wasn't putting on a cruel act just to laugh at in the future with his friends… Unless Light was extremely swell in acting, but it was near to impossible. When Light showed emotion like being concerned for L, it was in his eyes. L could just feel that he was genuine legitimate about all of this, and it just made L happier than usual.

"May I ask a rather… personal question?" Light muttered, looking a little nervous.

L nodded; still gazing into Lights eyes.

"Well… How did your parents pass away?" Light broke their eye contact and moved his gaze to the floor. He wasn't sure why he asked such a personal question, but he was a bit curious.

"Light-kun doesn't need to be nervous; it's fine, really." Light looked back up to L as he felt a wave of pressure that he didn't know he had leave his shoulders.

"Well, my mother had an overdose of heroin, and my father committed suicide shortly after, which left me alone. I was rather young; only 7. I was clueless to what to do after that, so I wandered off. Eventually, Watari found me and brought me here. May I ask what happen to your parents?"

Light simply nodded and replied, "My family as murdered when I was out getting groceries. They don't let me use any transportation vehicles, so I walked. The walk is about 20 minutes one way; I shopped for about 25 minutes and I walked back I found them brutally murdered so I simply ran away from home and Watari found me," Light lied but obviously had to unless he wants to go to prison for man slaughter.

"Oh, huh," L plainly said without any emotion whatsoever.

Light waved his hand in a shooing motion and said in a happier tone, "Let's get off the touchy subjects. Erm, what do you do on your free time?" L placed his brutally bitten thumbnail up to his mouth and fondled his lip as he thought about all the boring things he does repeatedly daily.

"Well, I go walk through the garden often. I enjoy reading and mindlessly browsing through the internet. I also solve cases under the name of L. It entertains my boredom when I can't sleep." '_Which is every night.'_

Lights face brightened as he cooed, "So, you are a detective? Don't you have to be the age of 18 or older to claim a job like that?"

L slightly smiled at his enthusiasm and said, "Well, Watari made a false I.D. and did some other things that I shouldn't share."

Light chuckled and found that he was having fun learning about L. He has a plain mask covering his interesting true self and Light was eager to take the mask off. It would help L to be more outgoing and himself. Light smiled at the thought.

Light continued, "Being a detective must be hard work, though. Even if it sounds so intriguing and fun."

"Well, it is frustrating once in a while but overall in relaxes me. Usually they are easy and simple cases, but when a difficult and challenging case pops up, it always arouses my attention. I know this may sound cheesy, but I… I want to become the greatest detective in the world."

"Heh, you sound like the detective from _Death Note_."

L blinked, and blinked again, registering that Light read _Death Note_. The novel _Death Note_ is not a common book. It's kind of like a hidden jewel.

"Oh, sorry. You probably haven't read it. It's one of my favorites…"

"_Death Note_ is also one of my favorites." Light grinned and they chatted about novels and more intriguing topics. After a while, L felt much more comfortable around Light, and he felt like he should ask him about his stomach stirring and such.

"Light-kun?"

"Mhmm?" Light nodded as his eyes glazed with curiosity.

"Is it odd that my stomach flutters and stirs when I think about you? My nerves tingle unnaturally and my head pulsates… Is that normal? When I'm not around you my mind is filled with thoughts about you. I have never felt such feelings and emotions overwhelm me before and it greatly concerns me." L asked; completely clueless of what these feelings represented.

Light eyes widened and a blush lapped over the bridge of his nose.

"T-those are the feelings and emotions of… of l-l-love…"

* * *

**BITCH cliff hanger. Hint though, L isn't gonna be like OMFG REALLY LET'S MAKE OUT. Nah, L is gonna deny it and then he will realize it over time XD I think I ruined the purpose of a cliff hanger. Oh well ;o**

**And please review any tips and opinions on the story so far or just say something nice to make my ego swell. Thanks XD**

**Also sorry for any mistakes. I didn't read over it lol too tired. **


	8. Trinity, You Bitch

**And please review any tips and opinions on the story so far or just say something nice to make my ego swell. Thanks XD**

**Sorry if this chapter has too much fluff in it. I've been reading lots of yaoi manga again. Some time in winter last year, I couldn't stop reading yaoi, and it was the only thing I really did. I read sooo many fucking manga that winter XD**

**Disclaimer:**** Nope I don't own Death Note. It would be very, very different if I owned it XD**

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L blinked; completely stunned by what Light said. He opened his mouth to say something, but it instead hung open with not a single noise coming out of it.

After a long moment of awkwardness, L started to react. Scarlet red blush covered his cheeks as he hugged his legs closer to his chest with only his eyes peeking over his knees. Ls toes fondled with each other as his breathe became heavier. He looked like an embarrassed infant which was rather… cute.

L finally found his voice and he uttered out into his knees, "That's absurd. I am completely sure that I am asexual."

"Well, falling in love and being attracted to ones appearance is different. Falling in love is supposed to make you feel safe. You cannot stand being away from your lover, and if a long amount of time passes by, you would become depressed from not being in their presence. You would always want to make sure that your lover is happy so you can see their wonderful smile and hear their heart warming laugh. If your love is strong enough, you won't be bothered by their gender. Yes, being asexual means that you cannot be aroused by any gender, but if your bond is strong enough, you would never leave each other. Who knows, you would probably find something kinky to fulfill their needs. On the other hand, being simply attracted to their appearance would mean you only look forward to their body, and not their personality. For example, if a male saw an attractive woman somewhere, he would only want her body. But if he met the woman and they became friends -sharing each other's interests and learning about their sense of humor, etc- he would most likely develop feelings and they would fall in love. Unless the woman doesn't have the same feelings, then he would be friend zoned."

L was amazed by his speech about the differences of love and being attracted so ones appearance. Does Light have experience…?

"You said you never felt loved or been in love before, so how do you know so much information?" L asked, quite curious of what Light will respond with. It was interesting by how wise Light seemed even though he was still young.

"Well, you are correct. I never have been loved by someone that completely knew who I actually am. Not just appearance. And I never loved someone either, so I am not sure how I am aware about these facts. I just know I guess." Light shrugged and continued to watch Ls gears in his head move around; processing everything he had heard.

"Well, I am completely 100% sure that I am asexual. I'll never ever fall in love or be attracted to someone. Especially a male." Light felt a wave a sadness wash over him as L's words kept replaying in his head.

'Never fall in love? Even with a male? _Why do I feel so disappointed about not being loved by L… Is it because I've started to develop feelings for L…? No no no, that's _preposterous! _I've only met him a few hours ago…And He's a _male_!' _Light hated all these feelings overwhelming inside of him. It was almost too much to bear…

"You sound like a child afraid of getting cooties." Light mumbled, still a little sad about L's words'

"Hmph," L hugged his knees tighter, "I'm not a child," L said shyly and embarrassed which made him sound even more like a child.

Light smiled.

"Of _course _you're not," Light replied with an obvious sarcastic tone.

They both laughed briefly until they had gotten interrupted by the bell. Ug; how much L hated the ringing of that bell. It's going to haunt him if he continues to listen to it.

"Which class do you have next?" Light asked as he stood up from his chair; quickly fixing his auburn hair.

"Mathematics. It's not like I need to go, though. It's too simple."

Light chuckled. "I have the same class too; we should walk together."

"Can we… ditch…?" L uttered; a little nervous about the idea. He had ditched before, but obviously never with another student. Ditching wasn't a big deal in his school, because many students do it. Yes, the classes are much more challenging than in a normal school, but the student's intelligence is far too superior.

"Tch; I can't skip classes on the first day. But maybe another time if the classes are as easy as you say."

L sighed and untangled himself from his crouch position. L didn't believe what Light said because he seemed like a student that doesn't want to fail in anything.

The two students walked down the hall together; chatting openly while avoiding eye contact with the glares that pierced through them. L's ego swelled when he felt the jealous stares burn into him like acid. L didn't care though; because he knew that the most disgusting student in the school became friends with the new student that made a woman's uterus combust. It made L feel good that the idiotic students were jealous. He loved how they stared in envy as he talked and chuckled with Light.

L mentally shook his head; wondering why he acts like such a child. A child that loves to win and loathes to lose. He needed to fix that if he wanted to continue his friendship with Light. And L thought again; Light was his first friend, so would L consider him his… Best friend? He hated those words, but it made him feel giddy inside L thought about having a best friend.

'_Jesus Christ I'm acting gay. What is this boy doing to me?'_ L looked over to Light; gawking at the boy. How his brunette hair perfectly framed his caramel face. He has to use some sort of girly hair product to make his hair look so soft. Absolutely no grease whatsoever and not a single strand of hair out of place. Lights skin was also flawless. It is a perfect pigment with no dimples, nor wrinkles nor pimples. It was the skin that every being wanted. L's gazing was interrupted by Lights low voice. He merely sounded seductive.

"What's wrong, L? You keep staring at me." Light had worry in his eyes. It was comforting to L that he knew his friend was always concerned for him. It's weird, though. L's pulsating head has stopped and his tingling nerves did the same. The only thing he felt at the moment was his stomach filling with a pleasant feeling. It made L feel safe from the surroundings. It made him feel… loved. Why hasn't he felt these feeling before? And why is it only when he is around Light?

L bluntly blurted out, "How does Light-kun maintain such a flawless figure?" L dragged his eyes up and down Lights body; unconsciously stopping at his pelvic and hip region. Lights stance was sideways with his head turned toward L, so L can awe at his rump ass. He didn't mean to stare at it, but now that he is, he can't look away.

_'Why is it so plump and… and perfect? Can a male even have such a flawless ass like that? My goodness-' _L's absurd thoughts were interrupted by Lights chuckle. "What do you mean? I'm not flawless, but I'm defiantly flattered by your statement."

"Hmph," L was still starring at his ass, "Also, why do you have such a plump a-" L was interrupted again; which was good or he might of embarrassed himself. Although, this time it wasn't Lights soothing voice that filled his ears, it was a loud squeal.

"LIGHT CHAAAAAAAAN! ~"

L rolled his eyes as Light stood there; stunned with fear and shock as Mikami glomped onto him. Mikami is much worse from the last time Light remembered. He actually tried to hide his obsessive personality before, but now it's all free in the open.

"Where were you!? You ran off after you yelled on about how it's wrong of people to bully that Lawliet douche. But, I guess you're here now, so let's walk to class together!"

'_Light… Light stood up for me?' _It made L's heart pound and his feet shake of the thought. The thought of Light actually caring so much that he stood up for him. The pleasing feeling in his stomach increased; pumping into his blood stream as it overcame the hatred that dwelled inside his body. L loved the feeling of being cared for this much. He loved the feeling of being around Light, even though they only met today. It completely confused L of how one person could do this to him; then the thought of Light talking about love popped into his mind.

_'Is this pleasant feeling really love? No no no, of course it isn't. I am just happy that I have a new friend…_' L lied to himself again, and ignored his subconscious yelling on about how he might be Lightsexual because Light is the only person that he finds extremely attractive.

"No. I'm sorry, but I'd rather not become acquaintances with people who make fun of an innocent student. I'm also walking with L." Mikami hadn't noticed up until now, but when he did, he gasped. He embraced Light tighter against his body and almost shrieked out, "WHAT DID YOU DO TO LIGHT-CHAN? DID YOU DRUG HIM? PEEEERVERT!"

Light had enough. Absolutely enough. He pushed the glomping freak off of him and made him quiver on the hallway floor like a frightened dog. Frightened from being demolished by the teenager hovering above him with pure anger in his eyes.

"Why would you think such things about L? WHY DO ALL OF YOU FUCKING STUDENTS THINK HE SO DAMN TERRIBLE!? The feeling of being hated it utterly horrifying. It's terrifying to think of not being loved and cared for by anyone in this world. It's terrifying to think of being alone, but people like you still provoke it on an innocent boy?" Lights words pierced into Mikami; causing him to wince, but he was saved from being stabbed by Trinity's voice.

"You knowww, L isn't as innocent as you think." Trinity came out of nowhere, but was interested with Light's rant and maybe wants to have a little fun with it.

Light gritted his teeth and sternly said, "I'm not interested to hear bullshit rumors. Come on, L. Let's go to class."

Light grabbed L's wrist, but he didn't move. When Light looked back to L in confusion, all he saw was the look of fear in his eyes. Light was immediately concerned by L's actions and muttered out, "L, are you okay?"

No answer.

"Mmmm? Does the _victim_ remember?" L grimaced at her words, as anger started to mix with the fear in his eyes.

"L, we should really g-"

"Do you remember the feeling of having your fathers cock thrust up your ass? Do you remember being… raped?"

L felt the insanity boil up inside of him again; plummeting through his body; washing away any other feelings or thoughts. The only thing he could think of was destruction. Could be destruction of someone's body or mental state, or his own body and mental state. But right now, he wants to throw fists at this bitch.

"FUCK YOU!" And L did as he desired. His fist thrusted into Trinity's face, causing her to stumble around and drop on the ground.***Im a fucking poet* **

Light was speechless about this fact. Did L really get... Light couldn't think about that now, right now he needs to snap L out of this crazed personality.

Light grabbed Ls forearms and turned him towards himself.

"L, you need to sna-" When Light saw the hurt and shattered expression on L's face, his voice failed him. L's eyes were glazed and red, like he was about to cry. Only then Light realized that this rape rumor was true. L had been…raped by his own father. Lights heart and soul shattered when tears started to fall down L's pale cheeks. L tried to hide his crying sounds, but he couldn't. He wanted to cry and talk to someone about his horrible past for so long and now he was finally able to. L had finally found someone that would listen to him… Someone that appreciates him…. Someone who likes you he is.

Light felt the urge to comfort L and hold him, so he pulled L against his body while L let out wails into his shoulder. L clutched onto the back on his shirt for dear life like if he had let go, he would lose Light. But Light wasn't going anyway. He will always be with L.

"L, remember your idea about ditching? We should do that now. Okay?"

L let out a choky chuckle and nodded; slowly getting up with his wobbly legs. Light kindly asked if he could carry L, but he smiled and declined. They walked down the hallway; ignoring the staring and talked together.

" Um, Trinity, how did you know that L got… raped by his father?"

"Well Mikami, it was just a lucky guess."

"Idiot."

* * *

**Aw, poor L. What did I do ;-; And I also made myself the total bitch of this chapter, too XD But it's okay; Light will comfort him and make him feel safe and they will eventually confess to each other and have really hot kinky man sex. You know, toe sucking, asshole licking, ass smacking, role play, cock rings, extreme dirty talk, self masturbation in front of each other, dildos, bondage, begging, lap dances, chains, whip cream, Jesus Christ I could go on forever XD**

**Also sorry if the asexual and love thing didn't make sense. I was half asleep writing that part XD **

**I also didn't spell check so sorrryyyy ;c**


	9. This Is Romantic

**Whenever I check the reviews for this story and the numbers of it rose, I'm always like omfg I hope there's no hate comments… Did I do something so terribly wrong? ;-; And then I read all your supportive and wonderful reviews and I'm like, "People actually like my story ;w;"**

** So by that note, thank you guys for all the support on this crappy ass fanfiction ;o I'll also try to not be a lazy mother flicker and make longer chapters. **

**Disclaimer: ****No, I don't own Death Note or any of its characters. Fuck I wish I did though… Remeberrrr, hot kinky man sexxxx ;o Oh my god you would be in for a treat if I owned Death Note. All those lxlight pictures I've drawn wouldn't be a fantasy anymore ;w; Lol I remember my mom looking through my sketch book and she found a shit load of them, and she flipped out. Idk how she found my sketch book, but it was the one with only doujinshis and it was all guys XD. Kay, I'm just rambling… Enjoy the chapter C:**

Light was relieved at the sight of L that had a happier expression planted on his face. It was good that L has calmed down and stopped crying, but Light was still worried. He had the urge to comfort L; talk to him. L never had someone to talk and spill his worries to, so all his emotions were bottled up.

L might have looked happier, but his insides were crushed. He loathed the memories of his terrible childhood; the memories of being touched. It was so very tragic that L could still feel his fathers' long fingers linger on his skin like a fresh burn mark. L tried to keep a happier expression, though. He didn't want to make his new friend worry any more than he already is. It is quite wonderful, really. L is harassed constantly by the entire school; he has a very odd appearance that some might find frightening, and he has lost his virginity by force from his own father. Such poor things happen to L, but Light is still by his side. From all the things he learned from L, he still is friends with him, and it is truly wonderful to see such a strong friendship bloom in merely hours of meeting each other.

L sniffed a few more times followed by a couple of choky breathes while rubbing his tears away with his white sleeve. The colour red traced around his eyes, and stood out profoundly due to his pale skin. His tear soaked eyelashes blinked over his bloodshot, glazed eyes.

It was quite obvious that L had recently cried, which meant all the students were aware. And oh boy he was fully aware of the stares that surrounded him. Analyzing and judging; it was oddly making L uncomfortable. Oddly because L never felt uncomfortable from the gazes of other students, he would merely ignore them. It was easy enough, and he did it all the time. But now he felt more open, and the stares were actually starting to affect him. His shook his head like he was shaking away those emotions and continued to walk beside Light.

Light saw his obvious head shake; biting his tongue from slipping out, "What's wrong?" He knew exactly what was wrong, but he refrained his curiousness about his headshake.

'_He is just probably thinking about his past and wants to shake off his memories. I could be wrong, but I should not ask.'_

L might have another terrifying flashback and have another melt down. Either burst into tears again, or crack into an insane, fist throwing fit. So instead of asking what was wrong, Light chose the safer option in wording.

"L… I am here for you if you want to talk to someone. I will listen, okay?" Light hoped it didn't sound too intriguing. Fortunately L didn't become instantly depressed, but a flash of fear danced across his eyes while he body slightly stiffened.

There was a slight pause, until L broke the silence and muttered out, "No, Light-kun, I am fine. Although, thank you for the offer… I…I don't think I want to share more of my tragic past."

Light answered with a simple small nod, slightly disappointed that he couldn't be Ls' therapist and hear out all of his worries and things that have been bothering him. Don't get him wrong, Light would love to if it meant that L would have the bricks of pressure tumble off of his shoulders so that he could stand straighter and higher; forgetting about his past. But unfortunately L declined and still has the bricks on his body; causing him to slouch with depression and sadness. Light just wants to help L…

Silence dragged on that had the same vibe like the silence in the nurses' office. It was awkward and uncomfortable, seeming to last for a while even though only a few moments passed. This continued until they were out of the building and outside in the nice summer breeze. Light stopped and gazed at the beautiful surroundings of Mother Nature. His locked his sight on the big willow trees leaves dancing and intertwining together in the warm wind. Light inhaled the fresh air and exhaled; relaxing his tense muscles and let his thoughts breeze away with the wind. His eyelids slowly drooped closed and he decided to end their silence.

"It is much more beautiful here than where I lived in Japan." A soft smile crept onto Lights flawless lips.

L continued to gaze at his surroundings with his wide eyes while his abused thumb fondled in between his pale lips.

"I suppose so, although I have never been to Japan to take in its view. By that note Light-kun, if you enjoy the view, I shall guide you to the garden. It is even lovelier." L shifted his head to meet with Lights now open eyes. Ls subconscious thought otherwise, "_Though, I think Light-kun looks much lovelier than the garden_."

Ls flabbergasted mind kicked his subconscious in the balls and left it to writhe on the ground. L has an odd imagination…

Light chuckled and answered, "Lead me there." He unconsciously sounded seductive which resulted with Ls' stomach butterflies to fire up. A small blush danced across his porcelain skin as he turned on his heals to the direction of the garden. L mind kept repeating the same words, '_I am completely positive that these feelings are not love, so why_ do_I feel like this? What is the goddamn cause of these nuisance emotions?!'_

He kept trying to comprehend the cause for these alien feelings, but once again came to no avail. He was completely clueless of the fact that he started to develop feelings that surpass friendship for Light, so he must suffer the consequences of being oblivious until he is fully aware. Being clueless and unaware drove L up the wall. He absolutely loathed it; it made him feel like a brainless infant that had absolutely no knowledge about anything. It dragged his self confidence deeper in the depth of hell. It would flame up; feel the burning sensation over and over, but never be _burnt. _It was immortal to the flames, but it would still have to suffer the feeling of pain and self hate until L found his answer.

The two students walked in utter silence, but it was more comfortable than before. They enjoyed the sound of the birds harmonizing together in small chirps; the soft pounding sound of a wood pecker drilling into a tree and the lovely laughter of joy coming from small innocent children playing soccer on that grass field. It was beautiful how the trees swayed with the summer breeze along with the green grass.

It was an amazing view and atmosphere, but when Light saw the garden, it surpassed it by a long shot. There was a small stone pathway that would lead them in between the different varieties of unique flowers and trees. It had a mysteries vibe to it due to the shadows that covered most of the garden from the trees that blocked the sun. The garden had not been treated and clipped in quite a while, so vines and flowers reached to the stone pathway, and some flower bushes grew bigger than others. Light found it more pleasant that the garden was very naturey and green than clipped and treated; it gave off a nice vibe. There was roses; tulips; anything you could think and it would be in this garden. A tiny waterfall streamed down the mossy rocks into a small pond. There were a few wooden bench seats around the pond, occupied by small cute animals that rest along them.

Light clenched his jaw to stop it from gaping in awe at Mother Nature's eye candy. He had never seen such a beautiful view like this before, so it left him completely speechless.

"I come here often to run away from the crowd, and loose myself in my own thoughts." L ended their silence but kept looking ahead.

"It's… It's outstandingly beautiful here. It left me speechless." Light said; looking to his left to gaze at the side of L's head.

L smiled and turned his head to meet his eyes with Lights. L gazed into the auburn eyes as they gazed back into his obsidian. A sudden gust of wind blew some leaves and flowers past them as the students kept gazing into each other's eyes. Their hair danced with the wind, making it seem like a scenario from a shoujo manga… But with men.

Light broke the gaze to the sudden flash of L's abdomen. No, L was not suddenly stripping, ***unfortunately* **it was merely the strong wind that flapped his white baggy shirt around; revealing his milky pale abdomen. L was not as scrawny as he seems; he actually has a decent shaped stomach. He has soft toned abs; definitely not bulky. The perfect shape of L's abdomen caused Light to start thinking perverse thoughts. Well, his subconscious anyway.

'_Now _that's _some nice eye candy.'_

_'No, that is disgusting.'_

_'Light, stop pretending to chase that pussy and go for the yaoi hole.'_

_' … ;-; …'_

_'Sigh… at least admit that this is romantic. We're practically in a BL manga.'_

_'…This is not romantic. It's just two friends that are men walking around in a garden; alone.'_

_'That sounds extremely gay.'_

_'I am not gay, though.'_

_'Noooo you are _definitely _not gay. Wearing a pink butterfly belt buckle is not gay at _alllll.'

'_I…I was only trying it on!'_

_'It's stupid to fight with your subconscious. Just accept the truth.'_

_'No!'_

_'This is romantic.'_

_'No.'_

_'This is romantic.'_

_'…No…'_

_'This is romantic…'_

_'Godammit, shut up!'_

_'This is romantic.'_

_'No.'_

_"_This is romantic."

Light was so caught up with fighting himself, his subconscious accidently slipped out of his mouth. Tenseness filled the air as L suddenly flushed bright red and stiffened his whole body.

"W…w…what…?"

** SHIT ON A FUN DIP LIK A STIK THIS JUST GOT REAL. SHHHHEEEEEEEEIIIIIIIT. *cough* ._. **

**Lol if you are confused about the pink belt buckle thing, Light actually wore it in the manga and in the anime opening. Fucking anime designers XD**

**Kay, I know I said I'll make longer chapters, but I purposely cut it short to cause a giant cliff hanger XD**


	10. A Shoulder to Cry On

** A/N:**

**ASDFGHJKL OMFG I AM SUPER SORRY FOR NOT UPDATING IN LIKE… FOREVER ;-; I've been reading instead of updating for you guys; I am so sorry for being a terrible person ;-; Also! I'm going to start naming my chapters. WOW I CAN'T BELIEVE I HAVEN'T THOUGHT ABOUT THAT EARLIER. **

(ノಠ益ಠ)ノ彡┻━┻ ***GENIUS* **(ノಠ益ಠ)ノ彡┻━┻

**Disclaimer**: 

**Are Lawliet and Light having kinky masochistic sex in the anime? No? Then I don't own Death Note.**

**A Shoulder to Cry On**

"Light-kun? What do you mean by… r-romantic?" L stuttered; still flushed and dumbfounded by the situation he is in. His oblivious demon grew larger as it ate more insides and organs of L; rummaging for the answers that may lay hidden in him.

'_No…Romantic? What does he mean by romantic? Does he have feelings for me? Or is he just being friendly… Why would he say that all of the sudden? Why do I feel like this!?' _Feelings of self loathe pumped into his blood. L hated this; he needed to know the answers for his questions so the obliviousness would stop tearing and scarring his insides. So that his self esteem would stop sinking in the depth of hell and rise from the burning sensation that strikes him repeatedly. So that the constant fluttering in his stomach when he gazes at Light would just…stop…

Light dropped a sweat as if breathe hitched; body solid still but mind running at an impossible speed to try to find a lie. Thinking and thinking… He thought being foreign would be a good alibi.

"Well… I thought English people would say things like that to their friends…" Light lacked the correct vocabulary, but he was panicking on the inside, so not sounding professional wasn't his biggest worry at the moment.

L felt a wave of pressure wash off him when he got the answer. He felt relieved, but oddly disappointed. He didn't take consideration of the emotion because he was use to these new feelings. And maybe if he ignored the head pulsating and the stomach fluttering, the feelings would stop. He would try to stop constantly thinking about Light and the annoying feelings would just die down or completely vanish. L loved the thought.

"Okay… It was a misunderstanding. 'English people' would normally say such things to their lovers; definitely not their friends," L slightly mocked Light for his wording.

Light nervously chuckled; fixing his auburn hair that got ruined in the gust of wind from earlier.

"I see…"

Another awkward atmosphere surrounded them; it was almost suffocating. The way the silence dragged on; not making eye contact with each other. But if they did, they would quickly look away. Yes, definitely awkward.

"Should we go sit on the benches, Light kun?" L finally said, once again breaking the uncomfortable silence.

Light nodded; aware that L referred to the benches at the small pond.

So the two students walked back to the pond that they passed earlier. Such an odd pair they were. One deathly pale, with eyes that almost seemed hollow. It was like if you stared long enough, you could start to see right through them; into his brain and read all of his thoughts. They seemed wide with curiosity if you glanced, but really they were only wide with self loathe and just… nothingness. His ruffled hair that stuck out in every direction would make a hairstylist gasp with fright. Hunched spine, panda like bags under his eyes, same oversized white shirt and baggy jeans that hung on his bony hips. L was everything opposite from the boy that he walked next to. He had neat and well cared for hair, unlike L had. His spine was completely straight, unlike L's hunched posture. Light has tanned skin, unlike L's. Everything seemed opposite from people who saw them, but that was only true appearance wise. They were quite alike in thought wise and personality and such. Both were childish; hating to lose. They often shared thoughts similar to each other; like having feelings for one another, but denying the thoughts. They were both puzzle pieces that fit with each other perfectly.

They got to the pond and sat down on the wooden bench seats. Absolutely gorgeous. The whole garden was, really. It would be quite sad not to see such a lushes green garden before the end of your time.

The uncomfortable atmosphere was gone…_again…_but a small portion still lingered in the air. They made a silent agreement that speaking at the moment would ruin the singing of the birds and the view of their magnificent surroundings, so the two boys just awed all around the pond. After a little while, Light thought it was a good time to speak. Well, at least try again with being L's therapist for the time being and hear the worries of L slip out of his soft… cutely puckered… _lips… _

Light shook the naughty thoughts… _naughty…nasty… thoughts…._

Light closed his eyes and internally shook the thoughts and the sexual related words out of his head. He was scared that he was losing his sexual sanity, but really, it was his hormonal need. He ever so wanted to kiss L, but his scarred mind refused… He just found him so attractive; even though he was considered the ugliest boy in the school. Those stupid students were blind.

Even his subconscious is constantly reminding him that falling in love with another person the same gender as him is perfectly normal. That it is normal to feel attracted to a male...

'_Liiight…'_

Light's internal eyebrows furrowed when he heard the voice of his subconscious. Oh how he hated it.

'_Ug, we are the same person, Light. Don't think you can hide those rude expressions and hurtful words._

_'Why do I talk to myself…'_

_'Because you lost your sanity a little while back. And don't hate your subconscious. I am kind of like the thoughts you store in the back of your head; trying to refuse the idea of reality. But bad luck for you, here I am, telling you the truth of your real intentions.'_

_'*sigh* what do you want to say? I was about to try to help Lawliet…'_

_'Yea yea, I know. That is the reason I stopped you. I was about to say that if L starts to spill his worries and problems, he will need a shoulder to lean and cry on. Okay? Help him and comfort him. Make him feel safe and hold him closer so that he feels more comfortable. Say your words at the right time and be completely 100% truthful about them.'_

_'I am surprised that you are not speaking of anything perverted.'_

_'Because I am talking about something important, but all you're doing is thinking of his _soft puckered lips _and some _nasty naughty thoughts. _You can do all the nasty with him if you confesssss…'_

_'No thankyou.'_

Light ended his odd conversation with himself and opened his eyes to only be once again greeted with the green vibrant garden.

Before Light got lost in the view, he said something that would highly make L look over at him with uncertainty.

"L… I am here for you. I am here to make you feel safe, so you don't need to bottle up your emotions and worries. You will feel much better if you released everything, and now that you have me by your side, I will listen."

L did look at him with uncertainty, but replied with something that was unexpected.

"If only you do the same afterwards."

Light gazed at L's eyes, seeing that L wanted him to agree. Light thought about it, and figured that it was fine. At least he can still help L. Though, he would need to lie again about him killing his parents. Before he could respond, L said something more.

"I don't want you to be the only want to make me feel safe. I also want to help you and make you feel safe, too."

Light nodded; agreeing with L. "Okay."

L slowly moved his head down to gaze at his bare feet that fondled with each other as he took a deep breath. He felt relieved that he could talk to someone about his horrible past and be comforted when he needed it. L was grateful for such a kind friend.

"When I was a young infant, my parents were a giddy couple. We were like a normal family… They cared so much for me and did what they can make me happy, so I was very grateful… Then at the age of 5, things twisted from cheerful to dreadful and the cause is still unknown to me. They started to talk less and less… until they fought whenever they seen with each other… so that lead to them not caring about me anymore. I was like a burden." L's breath started to become choppy and his words were slowly filling up with emotion of sadness. Light caressed his back gently; offering comfort.

"M-my father… wanted me to talk to him in his office… I was excited that he actually wanted to speak with me… so I gladly went to see what he wanted to say… Then he locked the door behind me and…"

Light saw streams of tears run down the boys pale cheeks and sink into the soil beneath where his feet would be if he sat normally.

L looked up and stared into Lights eyes. His eyes were slightly red, though very watery. Little tears ran down L's reddish cheeks and dripped off his face at his jaw line. L looked like he pleaded for comfort, even though it was mostly masked by the emotion of sadness, but Light could still see it.

"Light-kun… he… he touched me…" L suddenly hugged Light to his chest and clutched the back of his sweater as he cried into his shoulder. Light put his arms around his back and pulled him in closer.

"L… Don't worry. I am here okay?"

L slightly nodded and continued.

"He raped me… I can still feel his hands on me… and I fucking hate it! I want him gone from my memory… I want the feeling of his hands to stop burning into my skin… I hate it…"

Light's heart shattered and he hugged L in closer; little tricks of salty liquid forming from his tear duct. He was about to cry for L, but he kept his tear in.

L tried to calm his breathing and continued with his depressing life story.

"A little while after, my mother had an overdose of heroine, and my father committed suicide. I was only seven… I wanted nourishment, but I got stuck in this shitty place with all the rude students and teachers. They don't know how it feels to be constantly hated by everyone after being through complete and utter _hell. _They just _love _to see me wince when they hit me. They made me feel like nothingness… They made me hide my emotions. But, one class a boy sits next to me. He talked to me and had a concerned expression on his face when seeing my ruined desk. He helped me when I was injured, though he still makes my stomach flutter and it is quite annoying. He opened up my protective walls that guarded… my whole soul… He stood up for me and risked his popularity on the most hated boy in the school. He makes me feel… safe… Thankyou, Light." They hugged as tight as they could, and Light smiled when he heard that L is now a little happier. Light is glad that he could affect L's life so drastically by just being his friend.

They let go of their hug and stared at each other; face close to one another. L's eyes were still puffy, glazed and red, but Light could see the appreciation in them.

Light could feel L's hot breath tickle his face; causing his stomach to stir. Light's subconscious kept repeating the word 'kiss,' but he tried his best to ignore the obnoxious chanting. He watched L's soft lips slowly part, seeming almost like in slow motion. "It is Light-kun's turn now. I want to hear his depressing story," L deadpanned.

Light softly chuckled at L's bluntness and nodded; making more space between their faces.

"Well I was abused by my whole family. They ordered me around; made me clean the entire house and do all the shopping. If I didn't do a good enough job, they would beat me. Or if the food I cooked wasn't what they wanted, they would throw it at me. I just wanted them to love me so I can love them back, but that was not going to happen. Once I…I did something that would cause any father to yell at their son, but for me, I got brutally beaten as my mother and sister watched on the sidelines. I'm not sure what my father hit me with because I was on the verge of dying, but he left an 11 cm scar on my back…"

L's previous smile faded into a frown, but he still stared intently at Light.

"What did you… do?"

_ 'I had sex with another man.' _"I had sex with a teacher. I am not sure how my father found out… but he did." Light thought that that was believable. He said before that it would cause any father to yell at their son, so that was sounded truthful. Any father would be pissed off if their son had sex with a teacher. Though, it didn't trick L. He knew this was a lie, which raised more questions, but he wasn't going to ask at the moment.

"Well, like I said earlier, I was out shopping, and when I came back my family was murdered. I ran away and Watari found me."

L narrowed his eyes; finding that this was also a lie. He didn't recognize that this was a lie at the nurse's bed, probably because he was too dumbfounded by the fact of gaining a new friend, but now that wasn't on his mind. He saw Lights eye twitch to the side and the small jolt in his leg, and heard the little hitch in his voice. L knew that he was lying, and he was becoming a little mad that Light is keeping secrets. No, not secrets, he was mad because Light was lying. If he really didn't want to tell L about his past, Light should just say so and not _lie._ L would understand if Light felt uncomfortable with saying some things, and he wouldn't push to hear his words.

Unfortunately, being lied to caused more and more questions to start bubbling up in L's mind, which he had no answers to. He had to feel the oblivious demon tear his organs open to find the answers; he had to feel self loathe pump back into his veins, and his self esteem lower its self deeper into hell. But now, he feels a new emotion. Disappointment. Disappointment for being lied too.

L mentally shook his head and quickly comprehended why his emotions are suddenly flaring like a woman when she is pregnant.

"L? What's wrong? Why do you look so angry?"

L blinked away the anger in his eyes, and thought if he should tell Light that he suspects that he is lying. If Light told him why he was lying, he won't have to feel the symptoms of being oblivious and that little ball of disappointment in his stomach.

"Light-kun, I think that you are lying."

Light tried not to seem nervous so that L wouldn't be more suspicious, but that is hard when the emotion is constantly flickering in his eyes. He calmed down and thought to himself that he shouldn't act so worried. Light would just lie again, and if L caught him, he would just say that he is a little uncomfortable with saying things from his past…No, that wouldn't work. He already told L how his parents died earlier at the nurse's bed, so wouldn't it raise more suspicion if he suddenly didn't want to talk about it?

Just… Lie.

"What are you saying?"

"I am saying that I think that you are lying. It is the small things, really. Your voice changes slightly, you glance away, and you twitch a part of your body." Light froze. He couldn't lie again; L would catch him. How could Light forget that L is a genius? His deduction and observant skills are extremely high too because L is also a detective…

Light could neither lie nor say that he is uncomfortable, so he just stayed silent.

L sighed; taking Light's silence as defeat.

"Light-kun, if you don't want to talk about some things, just tell me. Like earlier, I denied telling you about my past because I was nervous. So when you become more comfortable, I will be here. Remember what I said, if you help me feel safe I do the same for you."

Light nodded with a small smile on his face. "Thankyou, Lawliet."

Then, the old fashioned school bell rang; signaling that the students need to go to next class.

**Story time? Story time. *Ahem* Me and my good friend Harmony were on the school field at lunch making story lines for LxLight FanFictions. Then we kind of goofed around and made up a theory that Ryuk eats off a males dick to make the male into a female. When Ryuk eats a dick, that dick length adds onto his dick so he was a mega dick that is like 20 feet long. But if Ryuk doesn't eat off enough dicks, HE would turn into a female shinigami. And so, Harmony made a FanFiction about our theory. So all females out there, you were a male and you had your dick eaten off by Ryuk. Also the way breasts are formed is that the sperm moves up from your ballsack (and then like shrivels and falls off) to your chest and tada! Boobs full of sperm. Imagination is such a wonderful thing.**

**Once again. I am SO FRIGGIN SORRY FOR NOT UPDATING! ;-;! ;-;! Like I said before, I have been reading a lot of LxLight FanFictions and I'm also watching the second season of Orange is the New Black so I've been busy XD**


	11. Roomies!

**A/N:**

**I am sorry for late update. I have been feeling depressed lately, (phases and hormones-.-) and I was dealing with that. Fought with my online buddy… etc etc. Anyway, don't worry about me. Just enjoy the chapter c;**

**Disclaimer: **

**I... I want to own Light and Lawliet… and keep them in my basement… And force them to have sex together while I video tape it… BUT sadly I cannot because I do not own anything or any character from the precious series named Death Note. Lol that would be a unique sex tape X'D I also do NOT own BenGay. I just use BenGay for my back, and it has funny ass shit on it. Like Penetrating warmth… Like wtf XD**

**Roomies!**

* * *

Any other day would normally drag on for L, but this day was special. He had a new friend to talk to that pulled him out of his dark depressing thoughts... Instead of hearing the hurtful words that float around him continuously every day, he can instead ignore them and listen to the words that Light says. His words are filled with happiness instead of hatred like all the other students.

And instead of L walking alone to his own room, he walked with his new companion, because he invited him over for some tea and sweets. Though L has been wondering where Light was living, because all the rooms are already occupied by other students/orphans. That would mean that Light would have to be someone's roommate.… Who could it be? Instead of pondering the thought, L decided to ask.

"There are no more available rooms to stay at, so who is Light-kun rooming with?"

"Well… I am actually not sure. I told Whammy that it doesn't matter, though surprisingly I never got to meet my roommate yet. I don't even know my roommates name…I came to Whammys House a couple of days ago and stayed in a guest room, and when Whammy told me that he found a good spot, he denied me to go meet up with my roommate. He instead just sent me straight to my first class with my needed supplies and my room number along with the key. I suppose he moved my belongings this morning… Though, I don't understand why he is keeping it a 'surprise'." L raised an eyebrow and wondered why Whammy was acting so odd. He would never do this… And if there were no available rooms, he wouldn't wait two days to figure who Light would be rooming with because he would already have the information. Apparently not in this case. And keeping the information about Light's roommate withheld from him is definitely not in Whammys normal behavior. Maybe he is just being over worked.

L muttered a quiet "odd," though it was loud enough for Light to hear. Light was about to agree with him, but no words came out of his mouth, because, the number of L's room silenced him. There, the number '7' stood out broadly beside the wooden door like a black circle among a white background. His thoughts were racing and comprehending the fact that…

Light is going to be living with L now.

Light closed his gaping mouth and formed a comical smile that stretched across his face. He felt like he was going to burst out with an excited shriek; his whole body was feeling so… giddy. Light felt a little stupid for acting like a school girl who got asked to prom by the 'hottest guy in school.' But, his happiness took over all of his body, and it looked like he was about to explode from all of his excited twitching.

Why was Light so excited you may ask?

Because he gets to spend more time with his best friend of course!

'_Light, no straight man would be this overly excited to live with another male.'_

_'Shut up and let me have my moment.'_

L finished fiddling the key in the keyhole, ***A/N: Ha. Keyhole. That never ceases to sound dirty.* **pulled it out and twisted the door knob to pull the wooden door open. He put his room key into his back pocket while walking in the room, and was about to welcome Light but was stilled by the sight of luggage and such sitting underneath the open window across from the entrance door.

_'Luggage?' _was the only word that came into L's mind before he was suddenly spun around and he felt hands clutch his own. He was greeted with a giddy grinning face that suddenly blurted out, "We'regoingtolivetogether!"

Light spoke so rapid L could barely catch the jiff of what he said, but somehow did.

L smiled and his eyes lit up, excited that he could live with his new friend. Even though they lived in an orphanage, it was the _Whammys House. _The rooms were large enough for at least two people to live, though three would be a crowd. L drifted into thought of the fact that he has a new roommate. He thought they would be noisy, a nuisance, a litterer and rude for obvious reasons, but he never thought he would _actually _gain a roommate. Let alone a friend, but there he was; holding hands with his best friend _and _roommate.

L spoke up before he drifted too far into his thoughts. "This is splendid! The normal rooms are just a bedroom, but 7 is Whammys favorite number, so he added a bathroom with a shower and a small kitchen for cooking and such. _I _was the lucky one who got this room, and now I get to share it with my good friend!"

Light was still smiling like a child, and his feet were tapping with excitement. His body was shaking more and more until he _did _explode.

Into a glomp attack.

Light suddenly let go of L's hands that he was grasping with such strength, and sprang at L with a high pitched giggle. He had almost knocked L off of his feet, but L steadied himself before he was toppled over. He felt Lights arms wrap around his body tightly, and saw his bright face shine up at L's.

"I never had a roommate before!" Light giggled with excitement.

L had remembered at that moment of how Light was abused by his family, and how he would be punished if he did the slightest thing wrong. Or, just be punished out of sheer fun. But Light… was now living with someone that actually _cared _about him, and didn't abuse his presence. Light was now accompanied by someone that would _laugh_ with him and… _care _forhim when he needs it most. Not being rejected and brutally abused by his entire family. He was living with someone that… actually loved him.

'_As a friend of course,' _L corrected himself as he wrapped his own arms around Lights body.

'_So this is why he is so giddy…He never got to experience the feeling of… _love _and friendship. He never experienced such care in his life… I will always make him feel cared for. I won't let him live without feeling important and loved, and he will unconsciously do the same for me. Meeting Light has made me much happier; he even got me to laugh again… And now I shall make Light feel happy too.'_

L held Light tighter.

'_We will help each other, by just basking in one another's presence.' _

L smiled, and he had the sudden urge to kiss Lights forehead, as if a parent kindly kissing their children goodnight. Had almost _had_ but Lights excited voice made him stir away from his thought.

"I am so excited! And we get to stay in the biggest room… Can you give me a tour?" They separated from their hug, but still held each other's hand.

"Sure; I'll just show you the living room." They still held each other's hand as they spun around and was greeted with the living room. L was comprehending _why _he felt such a urge… urge to kiss his friend. Friends don't usually do things that intimate. Maybe a quick peck on Lights forehead when he is feeling down, but not just out of nowhere. It would confuse their relationship, though it is only a sign of care when Light is going through rough times… Right? To show that L cares and is there to help Light… Maybe L was thinking too much about this. So instead of pondering the appropriate time to kiss a friend -with only care of course and not an attractive emotion- L just shook away the thoughts and focused on the happy scenario he is currently in.

Yes, the room was supposed to be small, but like L said before that Watari built extra attachments to the room because it was his favourite number. And when L said he was 'lucky' he had gotten this room, he lied. He knew Whammy gave him this room because of is depressing circumstances. So, as L said before, he shown the living room to Light that was the first thing you would see when entering the room. It had a soft couch on the right side of the room with a lamp beside it. A glass coffee table with dark mahogany wood as the rim of the table and as for the legs was in front of the couch with a closed laptop sitting upon in. Candy wrappers where littered around the couch and the table, and L quickly muttered an apology for the mess. Light chuckled in reply.

A flat screen television was set atop of a television stand, though L always wondered why Watari added it in his room. L never used the television. And because of that, all the drawers and spaces in the television stand where empty; craving for movies and discs to be filled in its empty space. But nope. L doesn't watch neither movies nor television. The holes in the stand shall be empty and lonely for the rest of eternity.

That took a sad turn.

Fingers still intertwined, L led them to the kitchen. The kitchen had a simple stove,-which L never used- cabinets packed with diabetes, and fridge also filled with the same thing. Diabetes. Light was flabbergasted by how much sugar L consumes daily without _any _nutrition, but still has his slender figure and perfect pancreas. Light must order some greens and cook healthy food for dinner, but L interrupted his ranting and said they serve perfect healthy food at the diner hall. This kitchen is really only for keeping snacks and baking a once in a while cake. Though, L usually doesn't visit the diner hall because he can just eat his sweets in his room.

Light clicked his tongue with pretend anger, and L just chuckled at his flustered face. It was… Kind of cute to see Light flustered… L quickly shook the thought and shown Light their bedroom. There was no dining room, so L mostly ate in his bedroom or in the living room. Light began to rant about how not to eat on the bed because it left crumbs, which wear uncomfortable to sleep on. Then, the realisation that there was only one bed hit both of them. Where was Light going to sleep? L insisted on the couch because L was an insomniac and that would probably bother Light's slumbering. Though, he did feel guilty about Light sleeping on a small couch… They planned to talk about that issue later…

The queen sized bed apparently had two memory form layers underneath the bedding, and L told Light it was very comfortable. His back ached due to his posture and odd sitting position, so just lying down on the bed relaxed his muscles. He also put on a cream that soothed muscles and arthritis on his back, which was called BenGay. It was laying on the ground beside the bed, so L picked it up and showed him what it said on the front.

"Warm penetrating sensation." Light laughed, and said that that was brutal. L chuckled along with him.

The bedroom was bland like the rest on the rooms. A queen sized bed was against the wall with one nightstand ***A/N: One nightstand. HAHAHA* **on the right side of it. Everything was littered with candy wrappers along with cake crumbs, and a couple of fallen strawberry's that were staring to rot. Light muttered how L will _not_ be so messy for now on. L sarcastically agreed, and earned a serious glance his way.

Still holding hands, they went to the bathroom that was attached to the bedroom. Twisting the doorknob open while L muttered a welcoming, but was interrupted but the sight of blood. There where blood stained hand towels and a small metal blade on the edge of the counter sink. The sink had little trickles of blood, along with the floor and near the toilet.

They both widened their eyes, and L felt humiliated, small and… utterly stupid. That self loathe emotion broke his protector walls and flooded the inside of L's body in waves. He hasn't so much like an idiot in… forever. '_Now… Light has seen… Light has seen such terrible things_.' These thoughts kept broadly tumbling around in L's skull, similar to a baby rattle. Rattling around and around painfully hitting the inside of his skull with every shake.

L felt like dropping to the ground and curling up in a ball to sulk. He hasn't felt such… humiliation before.

Light swung his head with worry and felt his heart break when he saw the pained expression on L's face. He was more pale from usual, and his eyes were filled with… stupidity and anger and… self loathe. Light saw the little pricks of tears staring to develop from L's tear ducts, and Light instantly hugged L. It was like a sudden impulse. Light held L tightly and combed his fingers in between his jet black hair while softly speaking, "We will clean this up, okay? We will throw away the blade and you won't cut anymore… you won't _need_ to anymore… It is dangerous and I am worried about you… You will give up cutting…"

L let out a silent sob and clutched at Light's shirt; burrowing his head into Lights shoulder. "It is hard to stop," L silently said, though it was loud enough for Light to hear, because he felt his own tears start to fall from his eyes. Seeing L so broken like this completely shattered Light's heart.

"No… I am here for you. I will care for you and… I will make you feel safe. I want you to enjoy all the emotions I never got to. I will… I will help you. Just stop cutting… and know that I am here. We are here for each other…" L grew a small smile and thought, '_helping each other recover.'_

He lifted his head from the shoulder it was resting on, and was greeted with a boy that had tears streaming down his from his eyes. L's eyes widened and he mulled, "You cried for me… You really do care."

"Of course I care!"

L smiled, and planted his lips on Lights cheek.

Light blushed as he felt the boys soft lips on his skin. Exactly like two little moist pillows touching his cheeks ever so gently. Light knew it was a friendly kiss, but he couldn't help but fluster. It had meaning and emotion, like thanking Light for caring, trying to make a good difference in L's like and just being… there. There with him. Never leaving L's side even though he has the most terrible reputation and the most frightening past as an infant. Light could never be any happier as a sheer smile of bliss spread from one side of his face to another.

L chuckled when he saw Lights flustered and giddy face, and nodded his head. "Okay. We will clean his up, and help each other… _recover._" L could feel the odd feeling rush back into his blood again… And the weird sensation in his stomach, that Light called… _love._ L tried to ignore it as they cleaned his bloody mess and threw the blood stained towel into his laundry basket that would be picked up by Watari every 3 days so that he can clean the dirty clothing. L flinched when he saw Light drop the blade in the garbage, but kicked the idea of cutting from his mind. He didn't need to cut anymore… Even though it was hard to suddenly stop doing what was in his normal routine, L tried his best to stay strong.

They decided to stay and eat in their room instead of going to the diner room. Though, Light was having a hard time to find _anything_ that contained some sort of nutrition.

Light was rummaging through the kitchen cabinets and cupboards while he was wailing out, "Laaawliiii, don't you have _ANYTHING _healthy here?"

L's eyebrow perched up and he repeated his so called name, "Lawli?" He was eating a slice of strawberry cheesecake at the kitchen counter while patiently waiting for his roommate to find something.

Light smirked. "Yea, it is a nickname."

L rolled his eyes. "Can't you think of anything else?"

"Laaawlipop~ ?"

"That is horrible."

"Panda Puff?"

L chocked on his cake and shouted, "Panda Puff!?"

Light laughed; still searching for food, and finally found instant _ramen_ at the back of the cupboard. Luckily, it was not expired, so Light put it in the microwave and turned back around with a smug grin on his face. "Yes, Panda Puff. It is because you look like a little puffed panda. Your hair is all ruffled and jet black, your eyes are innocent with black panda like markings underneath them, and your skin is very pale. Just like a cute, little panda."

L blushed but tried to hide it behind the fridge door as he got another slice of cake.

"Then, you are Night Light."

"And how is that?"

L pondered it as he took out his slice of cake. "Because you act childish, and Night Lights are usually used by small children. It also rhymes and sounds cheesy."

"You are brutal," were the only words before he was interrupted by the beeping of the microwave.

* * *

**Aaaand I should get some rest. It is bloody 3 AM, and my fat cat is scaring me with his heavy breathing and loud snoring. He weighs 38 pounds and is shedding like a prostitute shedding her clothing when seeing the fat stacks her client has. Did I just compare my cat with a prostitute? Pussy, riiiight… I have a sick sense of humor. **


	12. Only One Bed

**A/N:**

**Hello my dearies! First of all… SHARK WEEK FUCK YEA **

***Ahem* I am back from a long week of camping in Castlegar ****J**** I had the urge to write for the whole week, though I didn't bring my precious laptop… I can't believe I survived. I only had my phone for survival with NO Wifi… But, through all that hardship, I got to see Lucy which was an interesting movie ****J**

**Oh ho ho yes, I almost forgot. I found a colored LxLight tentacle doujinshi so, I posted that on my Tumblr. So fucking hot you need to check it out:**

** post/93462912818/found-this-little-jewel-on-the-internet**

**Disclaimer: **

**Of course I don't own Death Note. If I did, I wouldn't be sitting in bed with messy makeup, chocolate stained clothing and bitten knuckles. Yes, I bite my knuckles because I love the taste of blood, and if I owned Death Note I probably wouldn't bite them. Maybe I would? Idk. *cough* I am probably a cannibal *cough***

**Only One Bed**

* * *

Light received his instant ramen from the microwave carefully, holding the rim of the cup to make sure he won't burn himself. L had no chopsticks, so Light just used a spoon to eat his meal. They migrated to the living room and sat down on the couch. L, of course didn't use the coffee table to eat on and just let his cake crumbs fall onto the couch. Though, Light ate over the table to make sure nothing dribbles. Seeing the mess around the room and the careless way L ate made Light speak up again.

"You need to fix your messy eating habit and clean up all the rooms. I can't _stand_ garbage and wrappers everywhere I turn." Light set his ramen down and looked at L with seriousness in his eyes. Light didn't want… _ants _and… and _cockroaches _to invade. Light flinched; thinking of how he would wake up from the feeling of little bugs crawling along his skin.

L simply nodded; cheeks puffed similar to a squirrel storing nuts and such in its cheeks. Though, L's cheeks were full of cake. Crumbs and cream were around his mouth, and somehow in his _hair_, making Light shake his head with disappointment. Light scooped up the white cream that was in L's hair before it quickly melted and became sticky, taking the appearance of…something _else_, and whipped the residue from his hand on L's shirt. L grumbled in reply, and stretched the side of his shirt to look at the cream stain, earning a small chuckle from his companion.

"Don't worry, I will help you tidy up. I'm not that mean," Light said with a smug smile, but got shot with glaring eyes.

"You wiped cream on my shirt…"

"Yes, but I took it out of your hair."

L sighed and took the previous small plates with cake crumbs sprawled on it to the kitchen; starting to clean up. Cleaning was never L's thing as you can tell. He never had _visitors_ in his home, except Watari who complained about the mess. Though, L never listened and just lived the life of a messy slob.

Light started to pick up the lollipop sticks and candy wrappers around the living room, and decided to just take the small garbage bin around with him instead of taking trips to it. Light swept off the crumbs from the couch into the bin, while L cleaned the tables and counters with a wet cloth. After a good hour of cleaning, Light was satisfied when the home was spotless. Dust was swept away and the food stained pillow cases and bed sheeting were thrown in the laundry basket, and L called Watari to pick up the laundry. Watari was surprised when he got the call, because L was never anxious for his laundry to be cleaned, though he was even more surprised when he saw how spotless L's room was. They said their greetings and goodbyes as Watari took the dirty laundry, and sat down on the couch; exhausted.

L eyed the luggage that still sat under the window, and wondered where Light was going to store his clothing. In L's closet, surely. Light had nowhere else to store it except folding it on the floor, or buying another closet. L didn't mind sharing whatsoever, and he didn't have many clothes, so it wasn't a big ruckus. Though… _sharing_ brung up the topic of where Light was going to sleep. Sharing… a bed? L _did_ feel slightly nervous of that thought, but he didn't want his roommate to sleep on the small couch. _Especially _not the floor. Sharing a bed. It won't be that bad, would it? Infant boys did it all the time at slumber parties and such… So, it wouldn't matter if they are 16 and 17… Correct? Maybe the circumstances were different due to the drastic change of age. But they are just friends, so it wouldn't matter. Yes, who cares? Other people won't find out, and if they did L never really was stung by what the students said. Maybe Light would be, but L was sure he was stronger than that. L nodded to himself; agreeing with the choice of sharing a closet and bed with Light.

"I am going to start unpacking; I think I have extra bedding in my luggage for you," Light said as he got up from the couch and walked to his luggage. Light took his luggage by the extended handle, and looked at L like to say, 'where shall I put this?'

L understood the unspoken question, and replied, "You can store your clothing in my closet."

Light smiled at how generous L was, but still asked, "Are you sure?"

L nodded. "Yes, of course I am. Where else would you store your clothing? I also have space in my closet so it is convenient."

Light acknowledged L with a sleepy yawn -tired and exhausted- as he pulled his luggage to L's bedroom.

Well, because Light ran away from home after he slaughtered his entire family, he didn't bring any clothing. Well, he changed out of his blood stained clothes of course, but was still too stunned to bring anything for survival. Just his being, and anything on him and that was it. So, when Whammy found Light curled up in an alleyway, franticly glancing ever where, he was very worried and brought some food and such for Light because he was… boney. Whammy spoke to Light and asked why was he in an alleyway, Light lied and said he saw his family dead when he came back from shopping. Whammy, being the generous type asked if Light would like to stay at the hotel he was staying at and let Light eat and rest for the mean time. Yes, that would be the scenario to decline; (stranger danger.) though Light wasn't in the right mind so he accepted. Long story short, Whammy had Light do an I.Q. test and was astonished by his raging I.Q. points. Whammy told Light about the Orphanage, Light accepted and Whammy gave Light money to buy himself a new wardrobe.

L followed behind, and brought up the subject of… _sleeping _as Light unpacked his clothing and such.

L twiddled this thumbs; staring at his pale toes that were fondling with one another and muttered out, "You can sleep with me in my bed for the mean while." Light stopped his hand from placing his black button up shirt on the clothing hanger, and craned his neck so he was facing L. Light's thoughts were spiraling around his head, and he kept thinking of the worst case scenario if he agreed. Like if Light was talking in his sleep; he might have that nightmare of being hunted down by a Chupacabra. He… Might have a dream, er, nightmare of killing his family…Or his subconscious might make him… _say things…_ about L… Or Light might have… an erotic dream. He would be watched by L with wide eyes as Light thrashed around; whimpering and moaning. He would awake to a flustered, embarrassed face gaping from beside him and sticky sheets. It would be awkward around them for a while, and Light did _not_ want to humiliate himself… So, stuttering, Light declined, "I-I will just sleep on the couch.

The uncomfortable tone in Lights voice was obvious, even though he tried to cover it. L didn't exactly understand why Light was _this _uneasy. _Sure,_ it was two men sleeping beside together in the same bed… but they are just friends. Even though L sometimes has '_weird_' thoughts about his friend, he tries to ignore them. So, unsatisfied and generously, L mulled, "Yes, you _could_ if you want back problems. Or, you could sleep blissfully on my comfortable bed. It is fine, Light-kun… yes, it may be slightly awkward, but we are friends."

Light sighed. What was the chance of all of that happening anyway? He rarely gets nightmares and there is only a 7% chance of having an erotic dream. It was perfectly fine. And he would rather sleep on a super comfortable bed instead of a small string couch.

Continuing hanging his newly bought clothing, Light smiled and said, "Sure."

Light tossed L the bed sheets that where packed in his bag. He bought bed sheets because… He wasn't expecting _this_. This giant beautiful orphanage that was so high prioritised. Thinking of slumbering in a small, dirty moldy room, he instead got to slumber in a clean one with no mice and bugs and fungi. Though, he never knew it would be this fancy, so he bought bed sheets just in case. He would rather sleep on a clean bed than a dirty one.

L caught the bed sheeting, and started unfolding it to stretch the sheet over the mattress corner. Luckily, the bed sheeting was made for a queen sized bed, so it would fit perfectly. Though, every fucking time you cover the third corner, the other covered corners pop out of place. Stupid bed sheeting.

After a couple minutes of failure, L was finally able to fit the bed cover over all the mattresses corners. He slipped the pillow cases onto the white pillows with ease, and same with the comforters cover. Smiling, L quickly made the bed, and gazed at how… _clean_ it looked. The bed wasn't stained nor crumb covered… and it wasn't unmade… He couldn't remember the last time he saw his bed actually _clean._ It's nice that Light is living with L. The company, his cleanness and how he stopped L from cutting, even though it was difficult for L to throw away the blade.

L sighed, and sat down on the edge of the bed; waiting for Light to finish unpacking. Though, a faint blush perked on his cheeks when he saw Light bending over; picking a shirt to hang. He couldn't stop… _staring_ at Light and couldn't stop his thoughts from thinking about how… his arse was such a lovely shape. Lights arse was slightly waging right to left with the song he was humming to himself to ease the boredom of unpacking, and L's eyes kept following its movements like a dog eager to lick a bone, but his owner is rude and keeps swaying it in front of his eyes; out of reach. L grimaced and his blush deepened when he thought of the verb; 'lick,' and quickly looked away before this thoughts became anymore perverse.

_'How can I think of such things… and why was I so _intrigued _by looking at my friends… ass? Light would be most frightened if he caught me looking. Because, friends don't do such a thing…' _Even though L kept telling himself not to look, his eyes slowly slid back to the display in front of him. And Light knew. He could feel L's stare, but for some reason he wasn't uncomfortable by it. He was actually having fun teasing L for a… odd reason. His subconscious was clapping, and a part of his scarred mind kept ranting on about how he shouldn't do such a sinful act, but maybe the soft kiss on his cheek made Light slightly break through his shell. Light chuckled to himself as he hummed a little louder, and swayed his arse a little more. Fun. He was having fun. But, he tease ended when his clothing was all unpacked, hung and folded. Well, except for a pair of pajamas to change into. And, tiredly, Light informed that he was going to change, and walked into the bathroom with his pair of pajamas. This let L have a few minutes of thinking time. Like how… he kept staring at his friends _arse._

'_What _if_ he caught me? And why was I doing such a thing anyway? I looked away, but my eyes kept gazing back… I mean, it _is_ a nice, plump shape…_ _It's _hard_ to look away from such a nice ass… _No. _No no no. What is _wrong _with me? I can't think of such things! This is not normal whatsoever.' _

Angered with himself and confused about his sexuality, (even though L is determined that he is asexual, or at least an asexual-heteroromantic.) he marched out of his shared bedroom to receive his laptop from the coffee table. Sighing, he walked back into his bedroom, but only to see his roommate half naked scurrying around in his luggage. Shirtless, with only baby blue pajama pants loosely hanging from his hips. He was in the same bent over position for L to gawk at, but the pajamas fabric was thin, so it rest upon every curve of the young attractive man. L, almost dropping his laptop erected (**A/N: lol**) a strong red blush from ear to ear. Stuttering, but still admiring, "W-w-what are you doing?

Light replied, but was still looking for something in his luggage, "Oh, I just forgot my toiletries." Light finally stood up with a decent sized bag that was apparently filled with toiletries.

**"**Okay…" L muttered, still admiring Lights fine toned abdomen, not realising that his staring was completely obvious.

Smiling, Light re-entered the bathroom.

Five minutes pasted of Light cleaning his face, teeth and brushing his hair (even though he is about to sleep.) and L completely confused with himself while he gazed blankly at his laptop's desktop that was balancing on his knees. Light, praying to fucking _God_ that he won't embarrass himself by having any _weird_ dreams, and L frightened that his entire being will be consumed by his perverted demon, and do _things to Light _while sleeping; vulnerable. It is going to be an interesting night.

* * *

**A/N:**

**Hne hne hneee… Aren't I just a little bugger? Cutting the chapter short ****_just_**** because I want to create a cliff hanger. Well, it is time for me to dress in my normal clothing (black and white , polka dots ((oh fuck yes)) my black layered dress with a kawaii fucking black mini fluffy kinda skirt, black tights, leather combat boots and my death note watch necklace.) and meet my oms new boyfriend. Woop woop sushi tonight bitches! Omg don't forget the high messy bun with polka dot rabbit ear style elastic. And my Domo purse. Styling in the fashiooonnnn.**


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